Where's the Tea Hut

The Gross Incompetence of the NWCL

2012-01-14T16:16:00.000Z

That bunch of clowns called the North West Counties League have driven me away from Non League football before. They couldn't run a p*ss-up in a brewery. I suffered so many wasted journeys going to ridiculously postponed games I packed it in. Friends persuaded me to think again and not let this incompetent organisation spoil my enjoyment of watching the game.

This season the NWCL have been back to their old tricks, today Saturday 14th January 2012 they finally did for me.

We had a bad frost last night. I spent all of this morning and early afternoon (up until 12.45pm) looking at websites, carefully keeeping a check on twitter and ringing up various grounds to see which games had survived.

A lot of games in reach were called off but at 11am AFC Liverpool announced that their NWCL game v Silsden HAD PASSED AN INSPECTION AND WAS ON! Bearing in mind how shyte the NWCL are at information I double checked this game would take place and left it right to the last possible moment to travel.

I struggled with M62 traffic and roadworks but eventually arrived at the Prescot Cables ground that AFC Liverpool use at 2.10pm.

I was met by locked turnstiles and the entire Silsden squad (in their smart tracksuits) angrily marching out the ground and boarding their mini-bus. "Whats going on" I fearfully enquired, "They've just decided to call it off" came back the reply from one of the players, he went on to say "two bloody hours to get here and they postpone it at the last minute.... the league told us it was on"!!!

So there you have it. Yet another ridiculously late postponement from those masters of farce The Glorious NWCL. This was a major balls-up even by their daft standards.

I wasted over 120 miles worth of diesel and gave up a gloriously sunny day (it was 6 degrees in Prescot) to let those stupid tw*ts from the North West Counties League f*ck up another of my Saturday afternoons. They really are useless.

They've done it once too often as far as I'm concerned.

End of!

Bootleg Report: Ramsbottom 2 Salford City 1

2012-01-13T18:50:00.001Z

This uncut visit report has not featured on the Tea Hut site before now. Recently came across it whilst surfing the archives of 'Tonys Non League Forum'. It concerns an FA Cup Preliminary Round clash that I attended at Ramsbottom Uniteds ground on September 2nd 2011 (a Friday night fixture). There are no pictures (unfortunately).

Here we go.....................

FROM TONYS NON LEAGUE SITE
http://www.nonleaguematters.co.uk/

Like Cod of the North I was also at........

RAMSBOTTOM 2 SALFORD CITY 1

Attendance 345

I respect Cods well compiled views but I have a slightly different opinion of the proceedings.

Not happy Ramsbottom decided to put the kick off back to 8pm to let a load of ale heads in who couldn't be arsed leaving the local pubs half an hour early. I passed most of these late comers driving around the corner to the ground at 7.10pm! They were all supping pints before toddling down to the ground 5 minutes before kick off. I strolled in the ground 20 minutes earlier and was the only person at the turnstile. Obviously the club didn't want the beer boys going back to the pub if they risked missing the start so they made everyone who'd been sensible in getting in a bit early pay the penalty. They should have kicked off on time, it would have served the ale heads right but greed is a funny old thing isn't it. Funnily enough I spotted some of the same late comers peeing all over the adjoining cricket buildings, typical!

As for all the hype about local people being able to see the real FA Cup trophy on show..... they kept it mighty quite about the ridiculous £4.50 charge for doing so! I'll stick to seeing it on the BBC. Ridiculous!

I also noted the 20% hike in admission price since the short time I last came here, nice to see a club taking note of the hard times around this part of the world.

As for the game, a superb opening goal from Salford in the first minute was a great start. Sadly, apart from a few good saves at either end the match turned out to be (generally) pretty poor quality with lots of mistimed passes and poor control. The referee very much favoured the home side as they kicked, elbowed and niggled without caution. A typical example was the Ramsbottom equaliser. The home sides NO.4 (Morley) cut down a Salford player with a blatant tackle from behind which unbelievably went unpunished, Ramsbottom went up the pitch, Salford put in a cleaner tackle (winning the ball) but got penalised, from the resultant free kick Ramsbottom made it 1-1. Salford suffered a lot more bad decisions as the evening panned out.

Wished I'd saved my money to be honest.

Harrogate Railway Athletic 2 Salford City 0

2012-01-08T17:59:00.000Z

Saturday 7th January
Evo Stik Northern Premier League Division 1 North
HARROGATE RAILWAY ATHLETIC 2 SALFORD CITY 0
Attendance: 78
Admission: £7
Tea Hut Stuff: Tomato Cuppa Soup and a Kit Kat
Weather: Gusty breeze, turned cloudy and quite chilly
Parking: On Station View just outside the club car park

The Match Shed trundled past the Blackstone Edge Reservoir high up on the Pennines a gusting wind was blowing sheets of water across the road, the Match Shed duly copped for it. The scenic cross country journey also took in the highlights of Hebden Bridge, Addingham and Blubberhouses, there was plenty of standing water in the fields as the tributaries gushed down from the fells. An hour and a half later I was in Harrogate taking the A59 Knaresborough Road to nearby Starbeck the home of Harrogate Railway on the suitably titled Station View. Todays chosen game was from the Evo Stik Northern Premier League Division 1 North, I've not been to the Harrogate Railway ground before and the visit of Salford City (one of the better footballing sides in the division) provided the ideal opportunity. A friendly chap in the turnstile bunker took my admission money and I was immediately surprised at the apparent scarceness of facilities.

The end I had come in at had a bashed tin fence and little else, across the pitch was perhaps the smallest Main Stand I had ever seen. The far end of the ground did have a stand which was half shallow terracing and half seats but the rest of the ground seemed to be made up of a few weather worn dark green portakabins. My target was the Tea Hut and I eventually found it set back from the portakabins near the exit gates adjacent to the car park.

It was a long white building with a big kitchen taking up half its length, the other section was set out as a sit-in eating area. I was pretty hungry, my breakfast was hours ago. My food choice today was somewhat hampered by the fact that I was having a big home made 'gut-buster' steak and ale pie with chips and mushy peas for my supper (once I got home). I decided to plump for a burger, or even a hot dog if need be (even I can't eat pies all day). I entered the tea hut which was already full of greedy looking Salford supporters huddled over steaming trays full of pie, chips and gravy. I approached the lady at the food counter. "Do you do burgers" I asked, "no" she replied, ok, "what about a hot dog" I asked, "oh no, we don't do hot dogs" came the response, my worst fears came to fruition... today of all days when I (for once) didn't want a pie, I end up at a tea hut that does pies-only and bugger all else! I realised I had to set my sights a little lower "alright, i'll just have a bag of crisps then". The woman smiled back at me "oh we dont do crisps here" she said. Bloody hell, this was one hell of a limited menu! I eventually ended up with a luke warm tomato cuppa soup and a kit kat! I scowled to myself as I trudged out the tea hut past the tables full of slavering pie monsters. That pie the wife was making had better be a good one. As I slurped the soup my attention focused to the sloping pitch in front of me, my concern was not so much the slope but the uneven, cut up and muddy look of the playing surface. It looked like they'd just had a 3 day Horse of the Year Show on it.

Salford are a side who like to play fast, pacy, passing football, this gloopy field of mud did not look good for their prospects, especially when you added a strong gusty breeze blowing towards the Starbeck railway station end.

Salford had been doing well over recent weeks and had picked up quite a few points, the opinion on the street was that they were not far from play off form, a win at bottom four Harrogate Railway was just what they needed to strengthen such lofty aspirations. However 'Railway' have always been an unpredictable side and they are well capable of upsetting form calculations at the best of times, never mind playing on a mud heap with a wind behind them. I got my scarf and gloves on, it was going to be a chilly afternoon. As kick off arrived it was disappointing to see such a poor attendance, only 78 souls turned out for the game, ok Harrogate Town were playing Histon in the Conference North just a few miles away but it was still a poor turn out from the locals, especially as more than half the gathered crowd had made the trip over from Salford, they brought the big orange and black banner with them which they proudly plonked behind the nets in the first half before cheekily putting it up in the locals Main Stand after the half time break. I wonder if the Salford fans were as surprised as me at the line up for City, there seemed to be some new faces and a few youngsters being given a game, I suspected injuries had forced a slightly unfamiliar line up. I knew one of the new faces, Lloyd Rigby the goalkeeper who'd done a bit at Rochdale AFC, I think this must have been his debut?

The game started very niggly and very scrappy and got steadily worse. There was plenty of commitment from the home side and naturally they seemed more at ease with the conditions (it is their pitch after all). Salford didn't like it. They struggled to get their normal game going and it wasn't long before player boss Rhodri Giggs was throwing a wobbler in the nearby dug out. After 15 minutes he shot out from the bench and threatened to take legendary hit man Gavin Salmon off the pitch if he didn't get more involved in the proceedings, Gavin was very much 'a fish out of water' today. To give Gavin credit he did get a bit more stuck in following the bollocking.

Railway had the wind behind them in the first half and forced Salford back into the mud. There was no way that football was going to be a winner today. Railway went 1-0 up when a corner swung in with the wind and overshot keeper Rigby and his defenders, despite a goal-line last ditch attempted clearance by Alex Mortimer the ball ended up in the roof of the net.

All 21 of the attending Railway supporters went mad. The rest of the first half was crap, the only winner was the terrible uneven pitch. It looked like a football match being played in treacle syrup for the most part. Half time I followed a gang of pensioners to stand outside the semi steamed up windows of the Director and VIP Hut, I wondered why they all eagerley piled off to do this? Perhaps they had some saucy strippers on or something, a couple of the old blokes did seem genuinely quite excited? Then I realised what all the commotion was about... the half time scores on Sky Sports, you could just about make out the screen between a couple of fat bast*rds sat inside the hut scoffing jumbo sausage rolls.

In the second half Salford had the wind behind them and there did seem to be a bit more 'go-forward' about them. It all went pear-shaped for the visitors when one of the growing number of Railway counter attacks came up trumps, Luke Durham got forward onto a cow poke from the back and edged it past the Salford keeper to make it 2-0. We then had a festival of defenders performing a cultural ritual of end to end hoofing and old time toe bunging. It had got colder and colder and the football seemed poorer and poorer, Salford had a last push at it when Rhodri Giggs came on for the last 15 minutes but despite hitting a post the 3 points went to the Railway, in all fairness they just about edged it but to be honest... it had been a pretty poor game of football.

I was glad to get back in the Match Shed and get the results on the radio. Harrogate is a nice place and it was looking mighty fine all lit up in the dark, there look to be some nice eateries and pubs for those inclinded to spend an hour or two sampling it.... I had to get back across the pennines for that Steak and Ale Pie!

All aboard for Harrogate Railway

2012-01-07T19:55:00.000Z

Saturday 7th January
Evo Stik NPL Division 1 North
HARROGATE RAILWAY ATHLETIC 2 SALFORD CITY 0

Just as well the Match of the Day camera's weren't there.
Not exactly the 'total-football' classic I was hoping for.
Bit of a blow to Salford's play-off aspirations.

Visit report and pictures due up on here sometime Sunday evening.

Stalybridge Celtic 1 Hyde 3

2012-01-02T19:58:00.000Z

New Years Day (Sunday) January 1st 2012
Blue Square North
Stalybridge Celtic 1 Hyde 3
Attendance: 1,806
Admission: £10
Tea Hut Stuff: Meat and Potato Pie £1.60
Weather: Surprised it was on with all the rain
Parking: Side Street off the Main Road, 5 minutes walk

Driving the Match Shed towards Stalybridge was a bit like a scene from that sea-faring film with George Clooney in it 'The Perfect Storm', I half expected the bloody fishing boat to overtake me. It was leathering it down. Up where I live on the hills it had rained relentlessly for days, I'd given up on the big local derby between the top two sides in the Conference North having any kind of chance of beating a postponement. It was more out of curiosity than expectation that I had rang the Stalybridge office at around 12.30pm. I was amazed to hear that the game was definitely on! I got my trawlermans gear out the garage and set out to pick Frugal Glenn up from a makeshift floating pier at the end of his lane. Upon arrival in Stalybridge the weather was almost as bad as up on the hills, some locals said it had only started raining around lunchtime? Unbelievable, there must be some some sort of micro-climate around here! The last minute jaunt in the Match Shed meant a loss of my dinner, Frugal Glenn had some emergency rations on board but I politely refused, sharing 3 cold samosa's left over from last nights dodgy Chicken Bhuna take away was not my idea of a snack, especially as one of the samosa's had broken up where the seat belt had been rubbing against his parka, half of the Indian delicacy had got through a hole in the lining, all I could smell for the rest of the afternoon were the remnants of that damp samosa in the unreachable parts of his coat. The scene on Mottram Road was one of hardened northern folk... backs bent into the driving rain as they ploughed up the hill like a line of football starved zombies moving towards the lights, me and Frugal joined them, the weather was disgusting.

At last we reached the car park and the queues at the turnstiles, a sodden Father Christmas looked up at me from a torn selection box lid half submerged in a dark brown puddle, you could just about make out the red of his tunic, must be a Hyde supporter, would this rain ever stop? Last time I had a pie at the Bower Fold ground it was crap, I had a burger in my sights as a dripped like a drowned rat in the Tea Hut line, wiping the water from my specs I spyed the price list.. £2.80 for a dodgy mincey cheese burger at a non-league ground! They can f*ck off! I ordered another of those crap pies like last time instead. I was that hungry it was more edible than previously, partly due to all the brown sauce I'd squirted on it.

Stalybridge had visions of a 2,000 crowd for this top-2-tussle and quite a good few Hyde fans had swam over to cheer on their league leader heroes, there was no trouble, despite fierce rivalry both sets of supporters seemed to pleasantly put up with each other. The sides had played out a 1-1 draw over at Hydes place on Boxing Day, rumour had it that Hyde had stopped Stalybridge playing that day and were intent on getting people behind the ball today? It was all nicely set up for a festive feast of football (even if it might be a bit soggy around the edges). I have to give credit here to the Stalybridge groundstaff, they had done a tremendous job in preparing an exceptional playing surface for this game, in view of the weather it was excellent, something not seen too often in non league circles. To emphasise this fact, it must be noted that other northern BSN fixtures had earlier been washed out at both Halifax and Guiseley, apparently some Halifax supporters had now headed here (just keen to see a game).

I'm not going to go into great detail about the match because there are some good reports already posted on the Stalybridge and Hyde websites about all the nitty gritty stuff. I'll just give my usual incompetent overview. To say these two sides were currently first and second it was a bit of a disappointing match, the wet conditions can be taken into consideration but for me... there were too many (simple) misplaced passes. Looking at the home side there was too much indecision going forwards, everything went well until they arrived at the 18 yard area then it all went a bit 'school-playground'. None of the forwards imposed themselves despite some great work from Jack Rea in midfield (he was tremendous throughout the game). Joel Bembo-Leta also applied some great wing back play down the right touchline but he couldn't deliver the final ball. Celtics deadly hitmen Phil Marsh and Connor Jennings just couldn't get going.

As for Hyde, they kept it tight at the back, built up play calmy without any panic and started to make it tell in the second period. The rumours of them coming here to spoil the game and take a point were completely unfounded, their forwards went up a gear in the second half and Scott Spencer was leading the way, his burst down the right followed by a precision strike to bang in Hydes second goal was a stunning goal (at any level). Hyde had taken full control after that second goal, Celtic tried to rally, their manager Jim Harvey had used all his subs to try and generate a bit more cut and thrust (these rotations started as early as the 60th minute), including the introduction of new striker Nick Rogan but the result was in the bag, Hyde had the more complete game plan and also (on the day) applied more composure and technical ability. The home fans started to casually drift off with around 10 minutes to go, with much mickey-taking from visiting supporters nearest the gates, the drifters would possibly have missed Hyde making it 3-0 in the 83rd minute before Connor Jennings got a last minute Celtic (consolation) penalty.

So the bragging rights certainly go to the Hyde club, a fine win in tricky conditions against what is normally a very good Stalybridge side... needless to say, the Hyde supporters absolutely loved it! I made Frugal Glenn put his Indian spiced parka coat in a plastic bag in the boot for the trip back home, he said it should stop smelling after a few days?

Knutsford v Gamesley POSTPONED

2011-12-31T19:39:00.003Z

After what seems like weeks of relentless rain its no wonder lower league pitches resemble paddy fields from the set of Apocalypse Now. I got the call-off call from Wong Fat Chong at 12.30pm. All Cheshire League matches had been postponed. Apparently Knutsford FC were offering pleasure boat trips to nearby Tatton Park from where the centre circle had once been.

Another blank Saturday I'm afraid. There was little on offer Football League wise (without spending a shed load of money) and I don't like going to League Grounds anymore really, they don't let you take a proper camera in for starters, so 2011 ended on a wet, damp, miserable footing for 'Wheres The Tea Hut'. Surely these horrible gale force winds we keep getting and all the endless days of non-stop rain will have to give us a break before too long? The winter is a cruel master in this part of the world, it certainly is.

All the best for 2012 Tea Hut readers. Hope to get the chance of a non-league game soon.

Rochdale 0 Yeovil Town 0

2011-12-18T19:23:00.002Z

Saturday 17th December
N-Power League One (The Old Division 3)
ROCHDALE 0 YEOVIL TOWN 0
Attendance: 2,692
Admission: Free ticket from 'Ron Atkinsons Neighbour'
Grub: Massive long queue (binned it)
Weather: Very cold, started fair but turned dull, remained dry
Parking: Off Edenfield Road, 5 minute walk

The snow and ice returned to the North West this week, nothing major, a slight covering and temperatures down to around -2 but it was enough to activate a string of local postponements in non league circles, my first choice planned fixture was Maine Road v Stone Dominoes, sadly it got the call-off. It was damned decent of new Tea Hut crew member 'Ron Atkinsons Neighbour' to kindly put me in receipt of a free ticket for (what he described as) one of the big league matches of the day, I was somewhat surprised to find out it was for Rochdale v Yeovil Town (the true Barcelona of mid Somerset). 'Ron Atkinsons Neighbour' is called what he's called because he once lived a couple of streets away from Ron Atkinsons house when Ron was Manager of Manchester United, he's wined and dined on the fact for years (the neighbour not the actual Big Ron). Anyway 'Ron Atkinsons Neighbour' is still doing a stint at an open prison for his part in a massive fake underpants scam (which may be a touch over glamourised from his part) so he passed me his annual Goldbond Lottery Members free ticket for Rochdale Football Club which he gets from his cousin who does the lottery but hates football.

Dale give free entry for one game each season to all Goldbond members. Frugal Glenn was none too happy I was given this treat, he flatly rebuked my suggestion that he was still welcome to come along so long as he paid in "I'm not paying 20 quid to watch that shower of shyte" was his carefully worded polite response. After years of not catching Rochdale in action this would now be the third time I'd seen them in one season, they'd yet to score in my presence, never mind win! I watched them lose at Bradford City in an FA Cup 1st Round tie which they deserved to win, and then last week (courtesy of reduced admission prices), I witnessed them easily surrender at Sheffield United's Bramall Lane. I parked the Match Shed at the side of a walled bowling green just the other side of Edenfield Road and after five minutes of a dodgy walk slipping along icy footpaths I was outside the Spotland Stadium, a much respected ground often given good feedback from away fans all around the country. Small groups of Yeovil supporters were huddled over brimming trays of Pie, Chips and Gravy from the Willbutts Lane chippy which is positioned smack bang opposite the away supporters turnstiles. They proudly wore their green and white hooped replica shirts, one fat lad was already struggling to wipe clean a green/yellow smear of English curry sauce which smeared over the stretched nylon. There must have been about 60 odd Yeovil supporters that had made the long journey up from Somerset, apparently the coach set off at 7.30am that morning, for a struggling side just dumped out the FA Cup by non league Fleetwood Town that is some dedication to the cause. As I arrived at the Main Stand turnstiles around the other side of the ground (where Ron Atkinsons Neighbours ticket was designated) I was surprised to find them still shut with small disgruntled queues forming, it was 2.30pm! A horde of out of condition stewards in skin tight high visibility clothing sweated off the pounds as they shovelled out spade fulls of second class grit onto sheet ice in front of the turnstile entrances. Surely something they should have ascertained as a hazard a good while sooner than half past two? Especially the ones with big labels on the back of their jackets stating Superior Chief Health and Safety Director (have they never heard of a basic risk assessment)? Even those hard drinking drug induced bonzo's from the Rochdale Youth Orchestra couldn't get access to the stadium!

They set up an impromptu free gig in the Directors car park instead, it was great to hear those old Hawkwind and Black Sabbath classics again, all credit to some of the Dale Pensioners for getting into a bit of rough and ready headbanging as well. As soon as I got in the Stand (unreserved seating only) I bumped into Grinton Borrington who also does a bit of groundhopping in between his commitments in the antiques and collectables business. Grinton loves a drink and quickly produced half a pint of rum in a plastic coke bottle, I politely refused a tipple due to Match Shed considerations but Grinton already appeared decidedly half cut. He'd been hoping to watch Warrington Town v Lancaster City but it had been postponed. I did hope he would behave himself, he said he'd got the nod from a couple of female Dale supporters in the Church Inn pub beforehand, then it all went pear-shaped when their husbands came back from the bar? He'd had to leave his pint. As regards todays crucial game, both Rochdale and Yeovil are having a very lean time. Dale can count victories on one hand. Manager Steve Eyre is under a lot of pressure from loyal fans who suffered for 40 years to get out of the basement division, they now look destined for a 'wimp-like' prompt return. The previous boss who 'did the business' in getting them promotion to League One, Keith Hill, has moved onto Barnsley FC and Steve is struggling to make his mark in football league management without many of the good players that have also moved on, either through transfer sales or the conclusion of key loan deals. Steve Eyre was in charge of the Manchester City youth set up and the Rochdale board presumed he would be the ideal candidate to further the Dale dream of establishing themselves at this higher level, it hasn't happened (yet). In defence of Steve Eyre his signings have had to be extremely careful, the squad appears untested, young or in some cases too old, there are no dependable, quality tried and tested successful players to call upon, true, players like Jason Kennedy and Gary Jones can do the business in the centre of midfield but the defence looks flimsy, even a bit slow and there is a serious lack of a threat upfront, the forwards seem young, nervous and lacking in presence.

As for Yeovil, it was great to see Darren Way on the pitch again, although this time as a coach rather than the excellent 'midfield-general' he once served the Glovers as, Darren had a bad car accident and has done really well to return to the game. I remember always choosing Darren Way and his Yeovil midfield partner Lee Johnson in my Football Manager PC game squads no matter who I was in charge of (great players). The current Yeovil side are struggling, Terry Skiverton is doing his best as Manager but confidence appears a bit low as to how they will get out of this slide, todays game against Rochdale is one they could simply not afford to lose. Back to what was happening off the pitch... Grinton finished the rum 10 minutes into the first half and said he needed the bogs, I never saw him again! Perhaps he spotted one of those married women from the Church Inn?

On the pitch Rochdale were taking the game to Yeovil and there was plenty of sharp inter-play between Akpa-Akpro and David Ball coming in from the left while Nicky Adams danced down the right, Harry Bunn was holding up the ball upfront and it only seemed a matter of minutes before Dale would score. Yeovil thought otherwise. The Somerset side soaked it all up and played out the game plan, sit back, defend in numbers and hit them on the break (unfortunately for the neutral there wasn't much hitting them on the break, in this match at least). Akpa-Akpro hit the bar, Dale kept creating chances but it often seemed the younger players were trying to walk the ball in the net, frustration reared its head and at half time it was 0-0. I'd had a pre match dinner back at the house, this consisted of a Pukka Steak Pie and Beans, to be honest, I was still pretty full. I went along to sample the Rochdale Tea Hut with a view to sampling a burger or something more than puff pastry and the like.

What I found was a massive long queue of gigantic proportions, I asked a bloke ahead of me "what are the burgers like here"? "Its only pies, pies, pies here mate" came the reply. I went back to the stand, I sat in the other end that Rochdale were attacking for the second half, there was bugger all to watch in the half Yeovil were facing! The second period was a copy of the first, more Rochdale pressure, odd periods of highly skilled inter-play, odd periods of dross, a few clear cut chances and lots of hit and hope.

Perhaps the true man of the match was Rene Gilmartin the Yeovil keeper, he was fantastic the whole game, he pulled off some wonderful saves time and time again (poor lad even suffered a dislocated finger and had it fixed there and then on the pitch), he just carried on regardless, a great performance. The icy cold chill set in for the last twenty minutes or so, it was painful to sit there to be honest, it was bloody freezing, I longed for the heater of the Match Shed.

It all ended all square 0-0, I reckon Yeovil would be a lot more pleased with the result than Rochdale. Dale needed 3 points from this game, if they cannot beat teams like Yeovil (no disrespect intended) especially at home, one has to wonder where they will gather enough points to remain in this division? Rochdale go to Tranmere on Boxing Day, that looks a lot more difficult than what was on the menu today. I just hope somebody will buy Steve Eyre a nice warm coat for christmas. Why does he only wear a jumper on the touchline when its obviously bloody freezing? Get a duffle coat on man!

Update as of Monday 19th December: Rochdale AFC today sacked Manager Steve Eyre and his Assistant Frankie Bunn. It appears the Yeovil fixture was a game too far.

Postponements: Seen it all now!

2011-12-14T10:22:00.003Z

Radcliffe Borough postponed last nights Lancashire Cup Quarter Final match with Barrow because it was a bit windy! The news was posted on the Evo Stik fixtures page yesterday evening.

The Radcliffe official website simply says it was due to health and safety concerns?

The Barrow site provides a tad more clarity..... apparently, it appears one of the floodlights was not adequately maintained and was in danger of blowing down onto spectators? It seems Barrow didn't get told of the problem until late afternoon!

You couldn't make this stuff up (unbelievable).

What the hell is going on with non league football in the North West?

No wonder a lot of spectators can't be arsed anymore.

This is the second time that Radcliffe have pulled this fixture, first time around it was the usual 'northern classic' the traditional waterlogged pitch.

Sheffield United 3 Rochdale 0

2011-12-11T16:28:00.001Z

Saturday 10th December 2011
N Power League One (The old Third Division)
SHEFFIELD UNITED 3 ROCHDALE 0
Attendance: 15,892
Admission: £15
Grub: Fish, Chips & Curry Sauce £3, Tea £1.80
Parking: Horrendous! Ended up miles from the ground
Weather: Dull, damp, showers, cold (ok for Sheffield)

With a lot of Northern non league games either already postponed or under a late threat of being called off just before kick off me and Frugal Glenn took the safe option. We could have done Stockport v Stalybridge in the FA Trophy but I didn't fancy the ultra right wing stewarding policy at the ground with the Rugby Union pitch markings. We could have also done Ossett Albion v Salford City but the food is crap at Ossett and its not long since the last visit. So it was off to the Steel City and the delights of Bramall Lane. The only negative is that I couldn't get the camera in so there's no pictures. Last time I went to Bramall Lane I went on the train (to see a Plymouth Argyle away win, I think, or was it a draw), the time before that was a good few years back against Forest and I remembered there being lots of street parking around the terraced houses close to the ground, this time around I was dismayed to find that every single street had been designated 'permit holders' only. For 45 minutes I struggled to get a parking spot for the match shed, I ended up in another part of Sheffield behind the big bus garage, it seemed miles from the ground and Frugal Glenn was none too happy with the route march to the ground, especially as he had some new shoes on which hadn't been broken in. It was 2.30pm when I rushed into the chippy next to the ground, I hadn't had anything to eat since half a bowl of cornflakes first thing in the morning. The tiny chippy was packed with Blades fans who all appeared to be regulars. I found out they did special mini fish dinners which consisted of a smaller sized cod or haddock (which still seemed bigger than normal portions in other chippies), chips and either pea's, curry or gravy, all for 3 pounds, I found it to be excellent stuff and very reasonably priced. Me and Frugal got Main Stand tickets for £15 each, the Rochdale game had been given category C status which allows a major price drop from the bigger games in the fixture list (such as Wednesday and Charlton etc). It cost me £1.80 for a tea bag but this was league and I had to expect the rip-off, I needed a hot drink to wash my dinner down. I'm not going to go on about the ground as lots of people know the crack, I'll just mention that I find it a good stadium with good views (from where I was anyway), the all red backdrop is quite charismatic but the place really lacked atmosphere for this game, there were 15 thousand in the ground but the home fans never really got fired up about the proceedings. Rochdale took along a decent number of supporters, they got put in the lower tier of the Bramall Lane end, they did their best to support the team but its looking like a difficult season for The Dale this time around. I'll cut to the chase.... it was a crap match, simple as that. These looked a couple of very poor sides on the day. Sheffield United are a physical bunch who seem to lack flair and finesse, everything was crash, bang, wallop. None of their football flowed, it was all bits and bobs thrown together in a whirl of confusion. Rochdale look a side made up half and half between young lads and older journeymen, neither of whom can be described as quality first team material. Apart from the first 20 minutes or so Sheffields hardened pro's bossed the Dale kids around all afternoon. More experienced Dale players like Gary Jones and Jason Kennedy stood up to the challenge and applied a bit of craft where they could but the visitors never had a full deck at the card table. When Rochdale unfortunately lost their keeper David Lucas just before half time due to injury (he got knocked out for 15 minutes) things got even harder. Sheffield players like Ched Evans and Cresswell got far too much time and space from a disintegrating Rochdale back line. A 3-0 scoreline turned out about right. Sheffield were substandard, Rochdale (on the day) were far worse. A lot of Blades fans around our seats were very critical of some of the players performances and the Manager Danny Wilson came in for a lot of stick about a lack of width and the teams non-ability to put passes together. Rochdale Manager Steve Eyre is finding his first league job a lot different from being in charge of the Manchester City youth set up. Some Dale fans are on his back. I'm afraid relegation does seem a possibility if things continue as they have for the last couple of months. Dale seem to have a game plan but there is a question whether the calibre of player has the quality and technical ability to compliment it. It is noticeable that when the original starting plan goes off track (as it did today when Sheffield United went 1-0 up) Rochdale struggle to apply a different strategy to get back in the game. Dale played reasonably well for the first 20 minutes, after that they were never in the game. I dont think Steve Eyre is tactically naive, perhaps its more of a case that he hasn't the money to buy (or loan) the right type of players to play the standard of football demanded by his tactics. In that case the Rochdale board need to make some decisions (before its too late). After the game we made the long trek back to the Match Shed, we both agreed it had been a very poor game. Frugal Glenn refused to take the short cut up a muddy bank behind the bus garage claiming it would spoil his new shoes, they were only £7.99 slip-ons?

Colne v Maine Road postponement

2011-11-26T17:20:00.003Z

Saturday 26th November 2011
North West Counties League Premier Division
Colne v Maine Road
POSTPONED (at 10 minutes to 2pm)!
Attendance: Me, some other mugs and half the Maine Road team
Wasted Fuel: At least 10 quids worth
Weather: Breezy with a bit of drizzle in the wind
Parking: On top of a hill right next to the turnstile

My love/hate relationship with the North West Counties League continues. Ok, the North of the country got a touch of wind today and around about lunchtime it started raining a bit. That is not to say we witnessed uprooted trees and 'Noahs Ark' flash floods. Still, to be fair, if Colne (or should I state the referee) thought this game was in doubt, I could go along with the theory (just about). What I cannot go along with is to simply call this game off when a lot of people had already travelled! If the referee doesn't want to get wet socks and splash marks on his new shorts, call it off at 1pm and make sure everybody knows about it! I actually got access to the pitch after the referee had left the ground to do a bit of his shopping in that new Sainsbury's near Colne town centre.

Guess what, I passed the pitch perfectly playable. The only bit of squelchy grass was in one of the goalmouths and near the outer (non playing part) of the corner flag. Take a look at the photographs for confirmation.

It must be me getting old, I remember loads of times when pitches far, far worse than Colnes simply got the go ahead for a perfectly reasonable (safe) game of football. The NWCL have got it in the neck from me before this season for stupid postponements, this one joins the ever increasing list. I suggest they start monitoring and assessing some of the so called 'in-charge' officials for what criteria they are using when making their decisions whether a game takes place or not?

Just because some fine-weather ref would sooner do a bit of silly christmas shopping because a bit of rain might spoil his new hair-do is completely unacceptable! And I'd not had any dinner! The nearest I got to a Colne pie was the sign next to the fully shut Tea Hut.

How ironic that on the long drive home the Match Shed travelled past 3 separate public playing fields that all had games taking place?

Salford City 3 Skelmersdale United 3

2011-11-23T12:45:00.000Z

Tuesday 22nd November 2011
Evo Stik Northern Premier League Division 1 North
SALFORD CITY 3 SKELMERSDALE UNITED 3
Attendance: 122
Admission: £7 (Concessions £3)
Tea Hut purchase: Chicken cup-a-soup £1
Weather: Fairly clear evening, very chilly
Parking: 50 yards up the road from the gate

A busy night of football for the local clubs from around these parts but beware of cheap substitutes and inferior products..... forget the local playboys playing another round of over-hyped glory hunting down at Old Trafford, and shove the Etihad fueled millionaires poncing around the Bay of Naples..... tonights real football action was at the proud Moor Lane home of Salford City Football Club. I like the Moor Lane ground, it has a great old fashioned stand with plenty of leg room (almost like a life size subbuteo model but without the plastic), there are loud, witty and proud local supporters who continually get behind the team (no matter what ups and downs are occurring on the pitch) and there is an 'uncut' genuine warming football feeling that oozes out of the atmosphere from every nook and cranny. The tragic loss of the burned-down clubhouse a couple of seasons ago has not dampened the likeable character of the place. Salford have simply picked themselves up and just got on with it, rebuilt and remodelled.

Nice to see the Tea Hut in full swing, a steady stream of punters were queuing up for goodies, the burgers appeared to be very much in demand for the travelling Skelmersdale supporters, I got stuck in the line behind some of them and they bought loads of stuff. Come my turn I just had a chicken cup-a-soup, Frugal Glenn reluctantly handed me the quid for it, the arrangement is he gets me something from the Tea Hut in return for door to door travel to the game and back (he wasn't too keen to pay up this evening, he is immensely tight though). We took up a position in the Main Stand just to the left of the singers who regularly stand at the back in front of the big orange and black banners. They make a racket but I would recommend sampling it if you get the chance of a visit to these parts, it provides a lift to the proceedings not often witnessed at this level and its great fun listening to the cutting wit and the cheery songs.

Not sure if the gathered Skelmersdale supporters liked it much, perhaps it was their first time at Moor Lane and were not expecting it, the boisterous Salford lot were 'giving-it-large' to some of the visitors players who started the game like fluffy rabbits caught in the headlights. Skelmersdale had tactically adopted a Serie-A old Channel 4 Sunday afternoon Italian style game plan, it didn't work. Their back four continually passed the ball between themselves, sideways and backwards for ages, then they lost it without having made any headway. The Salford fans and the Salford team loved it. That crafty poacher spearheading the Salford attack, Gavin Salmon, was having one of his 'on' days, in fact I've never seen him play as well! His first goal was sheer class, a crafty step-over, the drop of a shoulder, a cut inside... next comes the traditional Gavin Salmon shot which usually ends up in a nearby back garden, not this time, Gavin struck a beauty which flew precisely into the nets like a stealth missile on a computer game, Frugal Glenn spilled his Bovril in shock. Up went the magical chant "Feed The Fish And He Will Score", tremendous! Halfway through the first half Gavin Salmon got a second, a real poachers goal after some cutting go-forward approach play from Morning and Metcalfe.

To their credit, Skelmersdale are a fine footballing side and they ditched the over-cautious fancy pants stuff to immediately grab a goal back. They started to apply more pressure on Salford but surprise, surprise, the home side went up the other end before half time and grabbed a third to make it 3-1, Salford were in dream land! Half time gave a chance for everyone to draw breath, it had been a very good first half of quality football and we all knew there was surely more drama to follow.

I popped by the brightly lit pitchside club shop during the break and a really nice chap was doing his best to politely get me to buy something. He'd been busy during the first half writing out his own marketing posters and missed all of Salfords three goals, he reminded me that the team had recently started to put on much better performances, including a 4-2 away win at Durham last Saturday.

Me and Frugal stood on the opposite touchline for the second half, amazing how much colder it was out in the open, the temperature was dropping fast. Skelmersdale went through the gears in that last 45 and really stretched the home side to breaking point. They got a second in the 52nd minute from a Tony Rendell header and at 3-2 the game was wide open again. Despite some lengthy periods of Skelmersdale possession, Salford still continued to counter-attack and rip through the visitors defence, Gavin Salmon almost had a magical hat trick, so near yet so far for 'The Fish'. The expected equaliser for Skelmersdale was being pushed further and further from view, could Salford hold out and take all 3 points? Sadly it was not to be, Skem got the crucial (scrambled) leveller with only 4 minutes left to play, one could argue it was deserved on the entire balance of play but it was a hard pill to swallow. Salford almost pulled off a sensational last gasp winner in injury time, as me and Frugal ambled behind the nets towards the gate Rhodri Giggs had a free header only a few yards out, almost in slow motion the ball looked to be going in before it disappointingly slipped wide of the target. Giggs fell to his knees, head in the turf, I could clearly hear his despair "No, no, no, no". Great game though.

Guiseley

2011-11-20T20:08:00.000Z

Saturday 19th November 2011
Blue Square Conference North
Guiseley 1 Stalybridge Celtic 1
Attendance: 738
Admission: £10
Tea Hut Purchase: None (some big bloke had it all)
Weather: Sunny, then misty, then sunny, then cold
Parking: Got the Match Shed right near the turnstiles.

Must say we are getting some jolly good days weather-wise for November, today started bright, mild and sunny, such welcoming conditions even made the Outer Beirut ring road around Bradford a scenic picture of tranquility. You cannot go wrong if you head east out of Bradford for some top tucker in the curry department, some of the takeaways and restaurants put the local Yorkshire Fisheries cabin type fish and chip shops to shame in the presentation stakes. However, i've had a dodgy stomach all week so I was being extra careful today, I gave the Chicken Dansak a miss. Despite a couple of missing road signs I managed to get the Match Shed on the Harrogate Road and finally the A65, the shift in affluent property and environment is startling once you're a few miles out of Bradford. I was doing the game solo today, Frugal Glenn is still serving a domestic ban for spending part of the shopping money on Football Manager 2011 (it was 10 quid cheaper than the 2012 version).

As I arrived at the ground I was surprised to find a few pools of mist floating around the place, already it was taking some of the warmth of the sun away. As I prepared for the turnstiles a big cream and red Maynes coach arrived through the mirk, it was packed with ale hungry away fans from Stalybridge, the steward by the gate took his Leeds United bob hat off and shoved it inside his coat. I've been to Guiseleys ground before and have always admired the big orange Pukka Pie sign hanging outside the Tea Hut. Like a carpet tack to an industrial magnet I was drawn 'zombie-like' towards it. Unfortunately I arrived as some big bloke in a Stalybridge coat ordered everything going (the greedy bloater), it was estimated that it would take 15 minutes for re-stocking?

As regards todays match, Guiseley are well known battlers and have a reputation of being a very hard side to beat. In fact, they beat Stalybridge Celtic only a few weeks back at Bridge's place in the FA Cup. This would be a tough challenge for the visitors but if Celtic want to be there where it counts in the league table they had to get something from this fixture.

As kick off approached I took up a seat with a view in the nice little main stand, it was a bit of a struggle to get past the OAP Guiseley season ticket holders as they grumbled about having to re-position their tartan woolly knee rugs and all the flasks and madeira cake slices. The ground was a bit empty as the teams came out but a mass exodus of bar-room ale heads soon had the terraces clogging up.

There are some excellent match report details on the Stalybridge website so I'm not going to go into massive depth about the game but I will clarify that both these sides played some dandy passing football today. It was gung-ho box to box stuff, obviously both clubs wanted 3 points and they were giving it a really good go. What was lacking was the quality and the control of the final ball, both sides created openings but neither set of forwards could capitalise in that first half.

With the scores 0-0 at half time the second period continued much the same as the first, it seemed each side would have a 10 minute 'golden' period where they exploited possession and applied pressure, then the other side would fight back and have a go themselves, it was entertaining stuff. Guiseley got the all important opening goal in the 53rd minute when Michael Brough somehow got the bobbling ball past outstretched keeper and the post sending dozens of Yorkshire flat caps up into the darkening November afternoon. The old timer next to me almost choked on his Werthers Original.

Could Guiseley hold on and shut the door? They certainly tried. Stalybridge immediately went up a few notches in urgency and the game became stretched, the Bridge supporters got behind the side but the referee wasn't helping momentum, he'd been easily fooled all afternoon and I was getting fed up with all the interuptions. With 9 minutes left on the clock Stephen Brogan floated over a Celtic free kick from the edge of the Guiseley box and it seemed to just hang there before unbelievably drifting into the top right hand corner of the nets! GOAL!!!

Whether it was a cross or an intended strike on goal remains open to debate but it had a dozen Stalybridge officials in snazzy Blue Square car coats running up and down the pitch side hard-standing in wild jigs of giggling delight!

1-1 and everything set up for a grandstand finish....except....... the referee didn't get a copy of the script, he ruined the last bit of the match by shamelessly bottling a banker Stalybridge penalty and then needlessly sending off one of the Guiseley full backs (the ref had a stinker). All in all I reckon a draw was a pretty fair result, two decent sides had fully contributed to a hard fought match which was played the right way all the 90 minutes.

Celtic switch off the Guiseley grinder

2011-11-19T21:06:00.001Z

Saturday 19th November
Guiseley 1 Stalybridge Celtic 1

Went over to Guiseley today for the Conference North match of the day. Stalybridge Celtic slugged it out with the well drilled Yorkshire Grinders toe to toe. After falling behind to the home side in the 53rd minute Stephen Brogan got the Celtic equaliser with 9 minutes left, a classic precision placed free kick (or was it intended primarily as a cross?).

All in all, a fair result. A full visit report will be posted on the Tea Hut site either Sunday night or Monday morning.

Bradford City

2011-11-14T12:28:00.003Z

I needed a bit of a break from the Non League profile last Saturday, especially after the Bacup Borough farce. I went along to the FA Cup 1st Round clash between Bradford City and Rochdale. City won 1-0 in a game which Rochdale failed to finish off (despite plenty of chances). Nice to go to a match knowing it would be on.

Am I on Candid Camera?

2011-11-09T21:59:00.001Z

Went to Bacup Borough v Colne tonight.
Wasted over 10 quid in diesel.
Despite the area not having any rain for almost a week, Bacup had a (supposedly) waterlogged pitch?
Nothing got posted up on club or NWCL websites (regards notification) until it was far too late.
In an autumn of such mild and dry proportions this really must be a mickey-take? Someones having a laugh for sure.
The NWCL seems to be riddled with dubious postponements and a strengthening stench of incompetence this season.
If you cannot get a game on in such calm weather conditions, you really need to question the standards of the pitch in question.
NWCL Non League clubs need to have a degree of (basic) pitch maintenance strategy (surely), why bother grading a ground for league status if you cannot play on the bloody pitch?
I've come across 3 ridiculous pitch situations in this league this season and its only the start of November (stand up Oldham Boro, Atherton Collieries & Bacup).
Bacup Borough, unfortunately, appear to be habitual offenders.
Just ask any one of the other dozen or so mugs who turned up at the gate 'gobsmacked' this evening if they feel the same way? ....and these were supporters who normally ring up Bacup pre-match 'just in case' they've called it off. The very same people didn't bother doing that this evening, because they all thought it could never be in question!

Don't know why I bother?
Not a good advert for football in the NWCL I'm afraid. Be advised!

Car Park Charging?

2011-11-07T10:06:00.000Z

I believe MK Dons have started charging people £7 to park at the ground on matchdays. A typical Football League style disgrace I know.

What is extremely worrying is that a number of Non League sides have also jumped on the bandwagon. It appears there is no end to the quick-buck mentality of getting the supporter to pay the piper in recession hit Britain these days.

When will some of these naive non league clubs recognise that people are struggling to find disposable cash to attend games in the first place, supporters are already coughing up more dosh at the turnstiles (in most cases), now some narrow minded (greedy) clubs are fleecing them even further by putting a price on parking the bloody car!

Its not on.

Stalybridge Celtic

2011-10-23T19:43:00.001+01:00

Saturday 22nd October
Blue Square Conference North
Stalybridge Celtic 5 Altrincham 1
Attendance: 1005
Admission: £10
Tea Hut Purchase: Meat & Potato Pie £1.60, Coffee £1.20
Weather: Mild, sunny afternoon
Parking: Sidestreet 5 minutes walk away

A visit to Bower Fold, one of the prettiest charismatic non league football grounds around, is always a treat, today was better still, Bridge were right up at the top end of the table and their much-fancied visitors from nearby Altrincham were tucked in the pack right behind them. Swelled by a good crowd enjoying the unusually warm autumnal sunshine this Conference North local derby had the makings for a classic. I didn't fancy paying a quid for the pleasure of putting the Match Shed in block-stacked-grid-locked parking in the club car park so I opted for a quite side street just off the main road. It was pretty early but I was starving, me and Frugal Glenn went straight in the ground and joined an already lengthy queue at the Tea Hut.

There were loads of assistants, helpers and cooks in the hut but only one girl serving. I was immediately disappointed to find that the choice of hot pies lent itself to only the meat and potato variety, the pie warming shelves seemed fit to burst with them. I almost went for a cheese burger but they looked a bit like those large thin ones of the economy back street slaughterhouse variety. A pie it was then, and a trifle steep at £1.60 me thought. I soon wished I'd had the burger, the meat and potato pie didn't have any meat in it and appeared to be filled with a dry tasteless gunge which had probably originated from potato slurry? It was pretty naff really and I didn't enjoy it. Frugal Glenn had one of those bovril/oxo drinks but said it was crap.

My pie was so dry I had to get a coffee, to charge £1.20 a cup was a bit cheeky although it did come in a slightly larger than normal polystyrene cup. With Bower Fold such a good looking little ground you'd think the Tea Hut would be bang-on, sadly this didn't appear to be the case. We had a stroll around the ground and took up some seats in the main stand near the halfway line. There are seated stands down both touchlines at The Bower and spacious covered terraces behind both ends, when matched to the lush tree lined scenery and the rolling hills behind the ground it is simply a perfect setting.

It was a bit of a sun-trap in the main stand and people were soon taking their jackets off. Altrincham had brought a good number of supporters with them and it was good to note that there wasn't a sign of any trouble as they mingled with the home fans without the need for segregation.

Stalybridge immediately got things (even further) on the boil by roaring into the game with some very smart passing football, they appeared mighty confident as they skipped around the Alty midfield before mercilessly skinning the one paced back four. Bridge look to have a real star in Connor Jennings, he's razor sharp with quick feet and a deadly eye for goal, he was causing all kinds of problems all afternoon. Alty went a goal down in the 6th minute, Jennings the scorer, a shot slammed home with the utmost lack of respect. Alty rallied and imposed themselves as much as they could but they looked a bit clueless upfront and soon started fluffing chances. Youth product turned decent player Greg Wilkinson got a slightly fluky second goal for Bridge in the 37th minute but to their credit the visitors bounced straight back with a well placed Damien Reeves header. Bridge were having none of this fightback nonsense though and a couple of minutes later Phil Marsh struck home a curling shot to make it 3-1, a scoreline that took us into the half time break.

The game had ebbed and flowed throughout the 45 minutes which was emphasised by the dancing size 13 feet of a female Altrincham supporter who was (unfortunately) sat right behind me in the stand. 'Twinkle-Toes' must have made every pass, booted every shot and crunched every tackle, sadly for me her heavily timed footwork was kicking the backside out of my plastic bucket seat. She simply couldn't keep those bloody big feet under control and kept on relentlessly kicking my seat. It got so bad I had to move, the woman couldn't keep bloody still. "Move up Frugal" I loudly pronounced "I'm black and blue from this arse-kicking", Twinkle Toes just glared at me blankly, completely unaware of what misery she'd been unleashing for the last 40 odd minutes. It was getting so uncomfortably hot in the main stand we decided during the break to go and sit in the shaded Tom Pendry stand, this proved a great decision because we not only got a great view of Bridge confidently taking the game firmly away from a gallant but extremely unlucky Altrincham side... we also got to witness some top drawer 'international class' flat-capper agitated moaning and groaning.

There were a few Alty flat-cappers sat around but one in particular was getting more and more worked up regarding the misfortune of his heroes going 5-1 down. It erupted big-time in the final quarter of the game. Never have I seen more high octane 'F'ing and blinding in such an open and blatant manner. This old timer was telling everyone to F*ck Off, the people sat behind him, kids politely asking if they could squeeze past him to get to the toilet, the referee, the linesman, a bloke with a bald head stood down on the terrace (who was also called a Bald Headed B*stard at least 5 times in 5 minutes) and needless to say, all of the Stalybridge players. He was so out of control to such a deranged degree that even his fellow flat-cappers tried to quieten him down (without much success). It was a top performance and had most people in stitches. The football on the pitch had not been as fast and furious as the first half, Bridge got another lucky break with an Alty own goal and that more or less sealed it, Altrincham still had some clear cut chances but missed the lot of them. When Connor Jennings put the fifth one in quite a few Altrincham fans made for the exits.

I suppose they didn't really deserve to get beat 5-1 but this Stalybridge side are on a bit of a roll (despite a blip in the FA Cup against Guiseley and a lapse last week at Colwyn Bay), it seems good times have arrived at Bower Fold for a while, it should be an interesting season. Keep an eye out for that flat-capper if you get to see Altrincham anytime soon.

Celtic blitz Alty in the big derby

2011-10-22T19:52:00.001+01:00

Stalybridge Celtic 5 Altrincham 1

People wearing spectacles may want to cover their face

Another charge upfield

Visit report from Bower Fold will be up sometime Sunday

Liversedge

2011-10-17T13:30:00.002+01:00

Saturday 15th October
Northern Counties East League Premier Division
LIVERSEDGE 0 STAVELEY MINERS WELFARE 3
Attendance: 130
Admission: £5
Programme: No thanks (lost faith in them)
Tea Hut Stuff: Steak Pie £1.20, Tea £1
Weather: Mainly sunny with light broken cloud, mild
Parking: Club car park

I had a stinking cold and felt decidedly under the weather. Last nights good-idea to drown the flu bug in an abundance of supermarket continental lager had gone horribly wrong. I had a head like a thirty bob cabbage. I went over the border where the barbed wire dips between 2 remote hillocks. The Yorkshire border guards were completely unaware as I jumped over the fence from Lancashire. I hid amongst flocks of sheep and pigeon huts before making my way some twenty odd miles through Calderdale to Quaker Lane in deepest Liversedge. I entered an old tiny shop for directions to the ground, the owner had never heard of 'The Sedge', he was dressed in a mint sauce splattered t-shirt which had a weird mans head on it with distressed hair, underneath it was splashed with the statement 'Ken Dodd is a Twat'.

I was about to leave (with a packet of past the sell by date Anadins) when his wife Owd Nora entered from The Snug and wisely told me to follow the big pot holes all the way to the car-park, "they're playin those fancy dans from Staveley today aint they" she croaked. I just nodded, not wanting to annoy her with my obvious Lancashire twang. I could only imagine what evil thing Ken Dodd had done to these homely people to make Owd Nora's husband wear that t-shirt, as he turned around to return to his cupboard under the stairs, I witnessed the full horror of the back of that very same (mint-sauced) t-shirt, there in brazen blue and yellow 10 inch capital letters was the chilling statement 'LEEDS, LEEDS, LEEDS'. Oh dear.

I was woken from my nightmare by a Yorkshire bloke tapping on the Match Shed window, "have you got your radio on"? I'd been asleep for over half an hour in the Liversedge club car park (the flu bug had knocked me out). "Er no, why, whats the matter" I replied, "I wanted to know if Man U had won at Anfield" he smiled. Thank god it had only been a dream, Owd Nora and her Ken Dodd hating husband had just been a figment of my imagination.

I'd been to the Clayborn Ground, home of Liversedge FC before, a night match last season against Armthorpe Wefare. Its a nice tidy place with decent views afforded by the fact that 3 sides of the pitch are complemented by raised banking. With the sun shining over the well kept pitch it was a great location to spend a Saturday afternoon. After the Ken Dodd nightmare I needed some sustenance so I went straight up the steps to the Tea Hut (it resides like a palace of pleasure adjacent to the clubhouse at the brow of a grassy mound overlooking the pitch).

I took a Steak Pie which had light pastry and tasty gravy but it disappeared in 3 or 4 bites (bit of gristle in there as well). I got the impression this may have been one of those Tesco type pies, you know, the 4 for a quid offers, it was ok as a bit of hot food though and at £1.20 it was far cheaper than some of the rip-off tea huts I've seen extortionate pies at lately. I washed it down with a tea (unfortunately a pound a bag job). I reckon cups of tea at non league grounds should be regulated with a ceiling of 60p.

Staveley turned out in that very bright orange away kit for todays encounter whilst Sedge went for a slightly classier Napoli orientated light blue number. I must say some dandy passing football was on offer as Staveley tore into Sedge straight from the kick off, it was just like that Dutch total-football stuff, poor old Sedge looked 'totally' baffled? A few grimacing looks started appearing on the faces of the local flat-cappers, Sedge couldn't get into gear against this finely tuned bunch of visitors, time and time again they were second to the ball and when they did get some possession the Sedge midfield quickly gave it away again.

It was a no-brainer that Staveley would score, it took 12 minutes, Ryan Damms made it 0-1 and there could be zero complaints. Staveley then missed a penalty and it produced a spark of hope for Sedge. They took the lifeline and began battling the orange tide. It wasn't pretty on the eye but they started breaking up the Staveley attacks and they just about kept it to a 1 goal disadvantage come half time.

Staveley appeared to be coasting a bit in the second half, Sedge did all they could to thwart them but it came as no surprise when Joe Thornton got the second goal in the 70th minute before Ryan Damms added a well deserved third. I must say this Staveley team look a bloody good side, no wonder a good few supporters had travelled along to cheer them on. As for Liversedge, its a case of must try harder but saying that they won't be coming up against the likes of Holland every week.

Back over Yorkshire way

2011-10-15T20:10:00.000+01:00

LIVERSEDGE 0 STAVELEY MINERS WELFARE 3

Nice to see a game from the excellent Northern Counties East League again.

That Staveley lot look a bloody good side!

A visit report will hopefully be posted on here Sunday night / Monday morning.

Great football haircuts

2011-10-14T11:18:00.000+01:00

No.1 of 500

The famous Merseyside 'Slant-head'

Absolutely Pathetic! Thats it I'm afraid.

2011-10-08T16:26:00.000+01:00

Saturday 8th October

A black day for Wheres The Tea Hut...................

After spending over 2 hours in yet another ridiculous M62 traffic jam I had to divert the Match Shed from its intended match day destination and take the unwelcome choice of heading for Atherton Collieries FC for their crappy looking fixture with Rochdale Town. It was 20 minutes to 3pm and this was the only game in range.

I slung the Match Shed down one of the Atherton back streets and rushed towards the ground. How strange nobody was around? Oh no, surely not! Yep, you guessed it, it was bloody well postponed!

How a bit of light drizzle can waterlog a pitch is beyond belief. I decided to go through the gate and take a look myself. Guess what I found, a pitch with not a thing wrong with it, no puddles, no swamp, no problems whatsoever, so why did they call it off?

I asked a couple of blokes getting back in their car a bit further down the road "Why has the game been called off"? The one in the passenger seat replied "I've just had a call on the mobile that half the team are already in the pub next to Old Trafford, they've got tickets for the Super League Grand Final"!

Now I'm not saying this is true but I will say one thing with a bit of certainty, that pitch was playable! Atherton Collieries are duly welcomed to my banned list.

After the joke game I went to see at Oldham Boro last week I'm just about sick and tired of being taken for a mug, this silly situation at Atherton Collieries has been an even worse incompetent chapter.

I'm currently of the opinion that I'd be better off doing something else with my 'diminishing' disposable income.

Some non league clubs need to sort a few priorities out (or they wont have any spectators at all).

Oldham Boro

2011-10-01T20:58:00.000+01:00

Saturday 1st October
North West Counties League Challenge Cup 1st Round
OLDHAM BORO 3 ROCHDALE TOWN 0
Attendance: 24 (10 more came in when the gateman left)
Admission: £5
Programme: £1.50 (An insult to match publications, rip off)
Tea Hut purchase: Frugal Glenn braved a cuppa soup at 90p
Weather: Bloody hot
Parking: On the street next to the car park

Oh dear! Apart from the plate of sausage and mash I had for my dinner before setting off, my match day afternoon was not very good, at all! The Match Shed had to battle with the usual batch of women drivers as they struggled to work out what to do at a roundabout and the temperature rose steadily to the point that it became nothing but uncomfortable. En-route to the Whitebank Stadium I briefed Frugal Glenn on the history of Oldham Boro and that they ground shared with Oldham Roughyeds Rugby League Club. Boro's opponents today in the first round of the North West Counties League Challenge Cup were Rochdale Town, local rivals from 6 miles down the road.

My background summary included reference to the fact that both sides had been doing a bit better than expected this season, so with it being a cup tie and a local derby we could be in for a good afternoons entertainment, how wrong could I be? It was bloody awful, and I mean AWFUL! Lets take it in order (some moans and groans being bigger than others), they charged 5 quid to get in when the standard in this division is £4, only a pound difference I know... but 20% more expensive than it should be. Next up is the match programme (if you are kind enough to call it that), I handed over £1.50 for nothing but a few pages of adverts, ground regulations and some bobbins about codes of conduct, there weren't even any fixtures, results or league tables, shocking!

An absolutely pants publication that was an insult to football programmes, to charge more than 20p for a match programme 'which had' very little match related content was scandalous. Perhaps a more serious problem to note was something which will doubtless effect every game played at this stadium, I'm talking about the pitch! It was in a terrible condition and its still the start of the season. Its badly rutted, grossly uneven and a nice crop of weeds are making a nice new home for themselves. This means any kind of ball control or even basic passing are items of a scarce rarity.

Obviously the pitch has been used by the Oldham Rugby League team during their summer season but for goodness sake, surely it can be given a bit of basic attention to simply flatten out the worst bits and get rid of some of the weeds. I would hate to come here every other week and suffer players struggling to play football on a ridiculous surface. This leads onto the game itself. I'm not exaggerating when I honestly state I cannot remember seeing a worse football match than what I stood and watched today, Frugal Glenn said the same, he wanted to go home early in the second half it was that bad.

The first half was pure rubbish with zero skill, zero quality and very little strategy or control, I'd seen much better boozy pub games on a Sunday morning than this trash. No wonder half time arrived with a 0-0 scoreline. Rochdale Town at least had a go at playing a bit of football in the second half but the pitch was getting the better of everybody (the photographs don't do it justice).

It was 75 minutes before either side managed a clear (on-target) attempt on goal. Oldham chased a random hoof upfield, the Rochdale keeper for some strange reason let it gently bounce over his head and one of the forwards following up tapped it into the empty net, a fitting goal to compliment this cup tie from hell. When Boro got another 2 goals in quick succession me and Frugal jumped for joy, we now knew for sure there wouldn't be any extra time. Frugals best moment of his (vowed) once only visit to the Whitebank Stadium had been his half time tomato cuppa soup in a proper cup.

Mine had been pre-match when I'd been lucky enough to be the first person in the single chemical toilet. What a shocker of an afternoon and thats despite the unseasonal wall to wall sunshine, such a change from last Monday night when I'd seen a cracker of a match between New Mills and Salford City.

New Mills v Salford City

2011-09-27T16:47:00.000+01:00

Monday 26th September
Doodson Sport Cup 1st Round
NEW MILLS 3 SALFORD CITY 4
Attendance: 105
Admission: A very reasonable £6.50
Programme: Decent enough at £1.50
Tea Hut purchase: Coffee 80p
Weather: Dry, mild evening
Parking: On the main road around the corner

The latest 'strangely titled' cup competition to hit the non-league scene is the Doodson Sports Cup, its not a new contest, Doodson are sports insurance brokers and have taken on the sponsorship of the Northern Premier League Challenge Cup for the next couple of seasons. This first round tie from the Derbyshire Peak District featured the upwardly progressive New Mills side taking on Salford City, a side that has gradually improved in quality despite the odd blip now and again. I've done the Church Lane ground before but this was my first visit under the lights. Its not the most elaborate or charismatic of places but it certainly provides New Mills with a stronghold, its ages since an away side got a win here (apart from Man Utd in a friendly). There is a social club behind the goals at the turnstile end, this also features a built in tea hut which was doing a steady trade just before kick off. The burgers and chips looked a bit dry so I just had a coffee. Frugal Glenn went beserk by splashing out on a bovril and some cheese and onion crisps.

Looking down the big wide (slightly sloping) pitch, a narrow covered terrace interspersed with a few rows of bucket seats and benches runs down the churchyard touchline before the open hard standing and big wooden perimeter fence kicks in for the other two sides of the ground. Already a few Salford supporters had gathered amongst the locals. New Mills are currently 6th in the Evo Stik NPL Division 1 South, Salford play in the Division 1 North and reside in 9th position. Both sides are already out of the FA Cup so tonights League Challenge Cup encounter was of a bit more importance than normal, something that was already being discussed by the rather fickle flat cappers with the amber and black home scarves.

Both me and Frugal Glenn were impressed with the admission pricing at New Mills, a reasonable £6.50 for NPL football is nice to witness, you also get a decent programme for £1.50, pity some of the other sides in the same NPL set up cannot be as competitive.

We were soon under way with the action and New Mills took an immediate 1-0 lead after a fierce free kick could only be parried as far as the prowling Daniel Douglas-Pringle. With 4 minutes on the clock Salford worked a superb equaliser after New Mills (normally) classy full back Michael Bowler had been turned inside out half a dozen times, journeyman hitman Gavin Salmon rifled in the equaliser. It was all action stuff and impressive end to end cup tie football, both sides went full-on for it and some slightly dodgy defending just added to the fun (for a neutral anyway). The New Mills manager Ally Pickering was going ballistic whilst Salfords player boss Rhodri Giggs calmly sat in the dug out. After 17 minutes the extremely sharp Jack Redshaw broke clear of the home defence and Salford had a 2-1 lead. New Mills bounced straight back through a Carlos Meakin goal 2 minutes later. It was the best half of football I'd seen for quite some time, 2-2 at the break.

The second period lost a bit of the cavalier spirit and Salford took a greater command of the game. Time after time they carefully created some tremendous scoring opportunities and it is a wonder they only managed to score just a further 2 goals through Scott Metcalfe and Cayne Hanley, both the woodwork and some wayward shooting prevented what could have been a rout, it is no exaggeration to claim that they should have had a dozen. New Mills spluttered to get into gear and the flat cappers with the cigars and the ready rub were in uproar. Scathing critisism echoed around the seating area in that second half. Personally, I thought this was a bit harsh as the home side played some good football in the first half and New Mills have been doing pretty well in the Northern Premier League after their runaway promotion from the North West Counties League last season.

Kristian Cox got one back for New Mills in injury time to make it 3-4 (very much against the run of play) and despite the referee adding on 4 extra minutes which he shouldn't have, Salford held on for a very impressive victory at fortress Church Lane. If only Salford could be a little more consistent and up the percentage 'completion-rates' a bit they could soon start reaping the rewards a lot of people in non-league circles consider them capable of, they are well worth a look if they are down your neck of the woods. Especially with players like Jack Redshaw, Scott Metcalfe and Mattie Burke in the ranks.

Non League Price Hikes

2011-09-03T12:00:00.000+01:00

I went to an FA Cup match last night at a North West Counties League ground. Admission was up 20% since my last visit there only a short while ago. The week before I paid 8 quid to get in at the next 'step-up' at Evo Stik NPL Skelmersdale, this club also charged me 2 pounds for a programme that took less than 5 minutes to read (and most of this was blatant advertising for bathroom sealant).

I reckon Non League football is currently rising in price faster than the pumps at a BP Garage!

A lot of clubs are now raising admission charges anything between 15 to 30%.

Programmes are seeing 50% price hikes in some cases.

And don't get me going about single tea bags at Tea Huts.

I know clubs have to battle the recession and inflation the same as everybody else but why cane the ordinary person in the street who makes the effort and sets aside a bit of spare cash to pay through the turnstile? Lets be honest, a lot of people go to non-league because they simply cannot afford the pathetic inflated costs to watch League Football. I'm afraid some Non League clubs are starting out on the same road!

I recently attended 2 games in the Evo Stik NPL Division 1 North:
Skelmersdale v Mossley
Bamber Bridge v Clitheroe
If I include my overheads such as fuel as well as the increased prices at the ground these 2 non league games cost me over 60 quid!

Its simply too expensive.

I have a fear that attendances will drop significantly by the end of this season. An awful lot of people who enjoy going to a non league game for an affordable VALUE FOR MONEY cost will no longer be able to do it, especially if they are struggling to make ends meet and balance the books.

In a sporting world where spectators are normally ripped off as standard I always thought non league was different. That it treated its public with decency, understanding and respect, that this respect extended to reasonable pricing.

I fully understand that increased bills have to be paid and the clubs have little say in the bigger economic balls up. All I would ask is that when the clubs consider putting their prices up, whether if its at the gate, for a programme, even for a cup of tea, they do it with an understanding that the people who come and watch non league football are also having a bloody hard time (well, a lot of us are). By all means add a little onto the admission or the tea hut stuff etc but please make it less than 20, 25, 30% at a time!

Otherwise, I'm afraid some people will simply stop going. Not by choice....but because they (sadly) cannot afford it any longer.

Skelmersdale United

2011-08-28T19:12:00.000+01:00

Saturday 27th August
Evo Stik Northern Premier League Division 1 North
SKELMERSDALE UNITED 3 MOSSLEY 1
Attendance: 206
Admission: £8
Programme: £2
Tea hut purchase: Meat & Potato Pie £1.80p
Weather: Mainly sunny and warm
Parking: In the club car park

Its not a rough looking town (like some have commented) but its certainly a characterless one, coming off the M58 Motorway I didn't spot a single person all the way to the ground. Its all bland carriageways and very large roundabouts. Me and Frugal Glenn had a drink in the clubhouse bar before kick off, it was here we first encountered the obsessive raffle ticket sellers who are more relentless than that bloke in Terminator (they won't switch off). I got cornered at the bar, at the tea hut, on the terrace, in the stand, one of them even followed me in the bogs, "I dont want a bloody raffle ticket and I'm not coming out till you've gone" I shouted from the secured confines of trap No.1.

With the coast finally clear I got myself a programme, I was somewhat dismayed to find they were charging a full 2 quid for it! I became a lot more dismayed when I found it wasn't worth nowhere near that kind of money. A five minute read with the usual fillers of history and cut & paste Evo Stik stuff from the league website. The chemical fizz of wishy-washy Carling Black Label had given me a second wind for some grub. I joined Frugal Glenn in the queue for a small caravan-type tea hut adjacent to the clubhouse. Frugal took one glance at the price list before making an excuse and leaving the counter, he'd want the bloody caravan thrown in with the burger for that kind of dosh (Frugal likes caravan holidays)! I grimaced in handing over £1.80 for a bog standard Hollands Meat & Potato Pie. I can get 4 of the same pies for just 20p more in our local supermarket. Without wishing to appear critical I did consider this tea hut to be expensive. You get it at League grounds and also a few Council owned grounds even in non league circles, Halifax for example... I didn't expect to see it at Skelmersdale. To add insult to the fleecing, the pie was so ridiculously hot it was nearly half time before I chanced a bite (and then it burned the top of my mouth). On a more positive footing, the ground at Stormy Corner did look very pleasing in the warm summer sunshine (especially as it had thrown it down back at home).

Its a modern ground but recently it appears that the natural backdrop of nice green banking has added some welcome charm to the clubhouse end of the stadium and to the areas next to the main stand running along the touchline. The clubhouse has got a kind of DIY add on roof-cover to protect people from the elements, pity they cannot tidy up some of the tubular steel protruding from the structure. As for the main stand its 4 rows of blue bucket seats are raised above pitch level but I was a little disappointed with the view in there.

The front of the stand has large metal fencing in front of it and the rows of seating are so shallow that anybody sitting in front of you blocks your view.

Never mind, I told Frugal we'd sit on the grass banking which spread around the far end of the ground. Unfortunately once we got there we were met with lots of little signs posted along the grass stipulating that you couldn't stand there because of the health and safety hazard? What a load of utter b*llocks! No wonder Safety Management gets a bad press with this type of bobbins going on. A tip for Skelmersdale United... take the silly signs down and let people enjoy the grass, what makes this situation any different from people sat (or stood) on grass banks in public parks?

I'd better get on with the football I think. Skelmersdale almost got promotion last season and have started this term in similar style. Mossley have yet to win a game and would have to admit that the start of the 2011/12 campaign has been somewhat disappointing. Skelmersdale dominated the first half hour with some nice passing football. They looked in complete control as Mossley chased them around the park. However, the expected (vital) opening goal they richly deserved never arrived and a tad of frustration and panic could be detected. Mossley fed on the home sides indecision and started to have a few trips up the field themselves. Unbelievably, against the trend of play we'd seen since kick-off Mossley grabbed a 1-0 lead through Tom Ingham just before the break.

This could be interesting, would Mossley be able to hold onto the lead and make things extremely difficult for Skelmersdale in the second half? Well the answer was a resounding NO. The 1-0 lead disappeared only minutes into the second half when Mossley haplessly failed to clear their lines allowing Robert McIntosh to head home, they gave away 2 more miserably defended goals to Paul Woolcott in the 50th minute and the impressive Shaun Tuck in the 77th minute. Such a shame for Mossley as all 3 of the Skelmersdale goals were very much avoidable.

I do have to say that the home side thoroughly deserved all 3 points though, they played the better football on the day and look a good side, the only negative was that last 15 minutes of the first half when they lost their way. No disrespect intended, a lot better sides than Mossley would be more than pleased to receive similar charity. Just to finish off on my day out in Skelmersdale, the Match Shed got lost on the way back to the motorway, no wonder because everywhere looks exactly the same and there are a distinct lack of road signs (at least for the M58 there are). Anyway we had a very nice 15 minute drive around all the roundabouts again before finally chancing on the slip road.

The Skelmersdale New Town Experience

2011-08-27T20:45:00.003+01:00

A visit report on Skelmersdale Uniteds 3-1 win over Mossley will be posted on this site Sunday evening. Some good things.... some bad.

In the interim, here is a picture of a debatably overpriced West Lancashire tea hut.

A pre-match nuclear pie which was still molten hot in the 75th minute

And a sign that (perhaps) recognises that Skelmersdale United haven't quite got the message regarding basic risk assessment and common sense safety management? The banking in question would pose zero harm to even a 2 year old!

It was the pie that needed the health and safety warning! It was liquid lava inside!

AFC Darwen

2011-08-24T18:28:00.000+01:00

Tuesday 23rd August
North West Counties League Division 1
AFC Darwen 3 Holker Old Boys 0
Attendance: 43 (My head count was 59)
Admission: £4
Programme: £1.50
Tea hut purchase: Tea at a quid a bag
Weather: Dry, fair, reasonably mild
Parking: Half way down Anchor Road, 2 minutes walk

The Anchor Ground is just up the road from Blackburn Rovers Ewood Park 'the home of finger licking chicken' (or is that another sponsors brand)? Anyway, there weren't many chicken nugget fans at AFC Darwen tonight, there were only 43 die hards in total, which included a few long distance Holker supporters all the way from Barrow. I got the crowd to an unofficial head count of 59 but there was a gang of noisy young kids running around the stand playing hide and seek for most of the evening... perhaps I counted them twice? I had earlier been greeted at the entrance by the 2010 winner of 'Most Unwelcoming Turnstile Operator'...Bert. I can see why he won it! Bet he got straight tens from all the judges. Bert later doubled up as someone who yelled stuff at the players, the referee and even a security guard in a neighbouring storage yard, he doubtless supplies hours of endless fun over a full season. AFC Darwen are currently bottom of the league, they've played 4 and lost 4, goals-for totals 2, goals-against is a worrying 18! The old Darwen club went bust at the end of the 2008/09 season. Re-born via the efforts of Derek Slater as a non-profit making concern they've bounced back as AFC Darwen. Having fought their way up from the West Lancashire League they currently reside in Division 1 of the North West Counties League.

The Anchor Ground is a bit of a rough diamond. I get the impression it was once quite a place? Today it still holds a character and charm sadly missing from quite a few other grounds at this level. The jewel in the crown is the Main Stand which runs almost the entire length of the clubhouse touchline. Its got a large water-tight roof (I think) and is reasonably well maintained. It has rows of very well spaced red bucket seats all offering excessive leg room, you certainly get some good views of the pitch (despite most of the seats being a bit dirty and dusty, best to wear a cheap pair of pants).

The other 3 sides of the ground are uncovered but they all offer a few steps of terracing.

Strange thing tonight was that not a single person (other than me) stood on any one of these 3 sides of the pitch throughout the whole match (apart from a photographer from the local paper)!

Most of the small crowd seemed to cram onto the raised level adjacent to the entrance to the clubhouse down near the corner flag? The tea hut is also part of the clubhouse, I just got a tea which was slightly steep at a pound a tea bag but I can live with it at a small club, they need the money, its when the bigger clubs rip you off that it bugs me. There is quite a lot of red trim around the ground which compliments the all red strip of the home side. Tonights visitors Holker Old Boys (average age 57) turned out in their traditional green and white kit and didn't look at all jet lagged after the long trip down the M6 from Cumbria. The Old Boys (ok, they're not that old) had enjoyed a few decent results in the opening throws of the season and were one of a number of sides in second spot (on points). Apparently they usually do rather well against AFC Darwen, no wonder Bert was in such a bad mood. We kicked off to a backdrop of unruly 'unsupervised' screaming kids charging around the stand (in fact they kept it up into the second half), why bring them if they have no intention of watching (just a bit of) the match? Kids are kids I know but this was ridiculous, the adult in charge should have kept them in order. I decided to sod off to the completely empty side of the ground, at least the screaming lessened in volume. The game was a bit direct and 'the hoof' was the chosen move of the evening. AFC Darwen had the bulk of territorial advantage but the possession brought little reward. Holker seemed a bit more tactically aware and created a few sitters which they duly fluffed, much to the annoyance of Jon Balm and Maurice Watkin the management team on the touchline. The home side stuck at it, none more so than the beefy Gaz Brown, he was getting some clattering tackles in, much to the disbelief of some of the younger 'Old Boys'.

0-0 at half time seemed fair enough (bet Bert would disagree with that). As the committee went to scoff their corned beef and pickle complimentary sarnies to the backbeat of a bootleg Shirley Bassey cassette, I had another stroll around the ground... dodging the kids from hell. Second half action witnessed some cutting 'go-forward' stuff from the home side, bet there was a major rollicking on offer from Kenny Langford as part of his half-time team talk? The pressure paid off with well taken goals coming from Carl Lonsdale, Bobby Langford and Carl Turner. Holker Old Boys had 20 minutes to turn around a 3-0 deficit. The well timbered Old Boys keeper spurred the Cumbrians on with a silence splitting yell of "We've not come all this f*cking way for bugger all"! I'm afraid they had, the home side kept a tight ship and despite a bit of huffing and puffing the Old Boys went home empty handed. Bert was in dreamland as he held court outside the clubhouse entrance "We're off the bloody bottom" he boomed out across the pitch.

Cuts

2011-08-22T22:08:00.000+01:00

Sign of the times.

No Tea Hut visit on Saturday 20th August.

Spent a fortune on falsely overpriced diesel on the Friday & Sunday due to business commitments.

There was no money left for my football visits.

If the Millionaire Club (Cameron & Osborne) dont get 'very' lucky soon (which I very much doubt) there could be a good few more blank weekends as well.

Apologies.

Bamber Bridge

2011-08-17T19:49:00.000+01:00

Tuesday 16th August
Evo Stik Northern Premier League Division 1 North
Bamber Bridge 6 Clitheroe 0
Attendance: 154
Admission: £8
Programme: £1.50 (Very good for the money)
Tea Hut Purchase: Tea 80p
Weather: Cloudy, late sunny spells
Parking: The street behind the full car park

What a cracking non league ground! I've meant to come here for a long while but postponements, mood swings and eating too much for my tea has always got in the way. Tonight I finally got to the QED Stadium (which is really called The Irongate Ground) and all the positive reports I'd heard were absolutely correct, its a great place to watch football. Even that tight-arsed Frugal Glenn had no complaints, an extreme rarity since he parted with 8 quid to get in. We got there about 20 minutes before kick-off. There is an impressive clubhouse, tea hut and small covered terrace at the turnstiles end of the ground.

Its here where you can purchase the match programme, a friendly chap has them all laid out on a table just inside the entrance. How refreshing to see a good quality publication with plenty of interesting articles, there's even colour pictures thrown in, must say it is well worth the £1.50 and the best programme I've seen for quite a while, far better value than the 5 minute cover to cover jobs I've come across lately. Apparently it's put together by Dave Rowland and Peter Nowell with some photography assistance from Steve McKelvey, well done gentlemen, a first class matchday magazine!

Moving along with the layout of the ground, the Main Stand is one of the best you're likely to find at this level, there are excellent views running down the touchline.

The far (wood yard) end is a small covered terrace which wraps around the corners before the open side of the ground rounds things off with hard standing running down in front of a small grass bank just besides the houses.

The stadium is nicely complemented by a good playing service, something which helped the quality of football this evening. I'd had a big plate of sausages and mustard mash before steering the Match Shed over to the South Ribble, I was mighty full but if I wasn't, the Tea Hut looked to have some tasty tray fulls of pie and peas on offer, judging by the amount of blokes greedily tucking in, it must have been decent stuff, one old timer, totally unaware, had got peas overflowing down his car coat!.

I just got a tea which wasn't overpriced at 80p. How nice to find teamsheets available for everybody on the counter. As regards the two teams this was a bit of a derby, Clitheroe are just up the road and a good few die-hards had followed them over from the charismatic Shawbridge this evening. Last Saturday was the start of the season and Clitheroe had suffered a disappointing 1-0 home defeat to Wakefield, as for Bamber Bridge, they went through the Mersey Tunnel (I dont like that tunnel one bit) to take on Cammell Laird and achieved an impressive 3-1 away win. Tonights game was only 9 minutes old before the drama began. Clitheroe lost their keeper Zach Hibbert through injury after a challenge with Brigs Glenn Johnstone, a crucial blow especially as the visitors didn't have a recognised keeper on the bench, midfielder Darren Green took the gloves of doom. Darren didn't do too bad in all honesty, ok he was a bit static on odd occasions but he also made some good saves (mostly with his feet). What happened in this game was weird.

The home side went 1 up in the 13th minute, made it 2 in the 21st minute, it was 3-0 after 32 minutes and 4-0 just on half time, me and Frugal Glenn both agreed (unbelievably) that it was actually against the run of play! Its true, in my opinion Clitheroe had far greater possession and played some excellent passing football. Clitheroe's problem (and credit to Brig, exploiting this) was that they opened up far too easily in defence and they simply couldn't finish worthwhile opportunities up front. Bamber Bridge were lethal with their finishing, John Cass in particular was extremely impressive. It was going to be a very hard task for Clitheroe to re-group and come again at Brig under the circumstances. During the half time break the Tea Hut looked to be under siege from masses of grub hungry punters (scenes from the Alamo or Zulu wouldn't be out of place), a quick Tea Hut snack was out of the question. Frugal Glenn shocked me by offering me something to eat free of charge for the first time in all the years I've known him (the miser). He'd purchased a new line of extra crunchy ginger nut biscuits from a backstreet Polish shop he's found, apparently there are major reductions if you dont take much notice of the odd 'sell by date'. Anyway, it turned out that Frugals ginger nuts were that crunchy his false teeth couldn't cope. After some swearing and a quick inspection of his lower-set he decided I could have what was left of the biscuit he couldn't finish off, such charity and generosity!

The first 13 minutes of the second half witnessed some more wonderful pass and move football from Clitheroe but still they couldn't create a clinical finish, Brig were pretty solid at the back (or was it the lack of someone to put the ball in the net)? The game ended as a spectacle in the 58th minute when John Cass prodded home the 5th goal.

You had to feel sorry for Clitheroe boss Carl Garner (who Frugal Glenn reckoned was a dead ringer for Norman Wisdom in his flat cap and raincoat), his side had played some great stuff in the middle of the park but the defence had let him down (and it was more than just the replacement keeper) and... 'importantly' so had his strikers. The 6th and final goal went in after 77 minutes courtesy of a sublime mazy Maradona type run from Brig midfielder Chris Marlow, a classic piece of football beating man after man before slamming the ball in the net. So 6-0 it was, a decent game partially spoiled by the loss of Clitheroe's keeper early doors but it certainly had some high spots, Bamber Bridge look a well drilled quality side who keep it tight but also have a dangerous cutting edge when they move forward.

To beat what looks a 'footballing' Clitheroe side 6-0 is a fine result. As for Clitheroe themselves, I reckon this defeat may take a short while to get out of the system but they do appear to be good enough to bounce back, its a bad start to the season for them and they do need to sort a few defensive and attacking techniques out but Carl Garner has players who can do a lot better and thats when (maybe) they'll start dishing out a few hidings themselves.

Ashton Athletic

2011-08-14T20:11:00.001+01:00

Saturday 13th August
North West Counties League Premier Division
Ashton Athletic 2 Maine Road 0
Attendance: 56
Admission: £5
Programme: £1.50
Tea hut purchase: None (took too long to get served)
Weather: Overcast, mild and dull (after 4 days of rain)
Parking: Club car park

There are a few Ashton named clubs in non league circles, Ashton Athletic are posted just north of 'Ashton in Makerfield', a small town which is located on the opposite side of the M6 to Haydock Park racecourse. The ground is a sod to find if you've not done your homework (or got a fancy Sat Nav). The Match Shed didn't have any problems as it chugged down the winding narrow lanes (which is quite ironic because it usually gets lost on the bog standard journeys). The Brocstedes Park stadium is along what looks nothing more than an old farm track, its badly rutted and pot holed, as you bounce around the bend the open expanse of Brocstedes Park comes into view, the M6 is just below the trees at the far side of the ground, such a pity that you have to drive miles out of your way to get access to the place. I bet there's not many sides who welcome a visit to this spot in the winter months, especially on a bleak Tuesday night. With the Match Shed parked up behind the corrugated stand a few Maine Road supporters were commenting on the difficulty getting here, I bet a few gave up and went back to Manchester. I paid my 5 quid admission behind about 8 or 9 Maine Road committee types with free passes waiting for them. The bloke on the turnstile asked if I was a concession (OAP), bloody hell, is this a startling wake up call that I'm getting a bit haggard, or is it too much late night over indulgence, I hoped it was simply a case that the chap couldn't see very well?

The entrance brings you onto the clubhouse touchline half way along the pitch, the club itself is part pebble dash and part breeze block, it houses a narrow looking function room titled Aspeys Bar (I think its named after the clubs founder Tommy Aspinall) and it was nice to find some decent toilets for a change. There is also a small cupboard like room which miraculously manages to house a Tea Hut facility, there is a narrow serving window to dish the stuff through. Besides the changing rooms, as we run further down the touchline we find a small VIP stand with seats reserved for officials, must be a cracking view from right down at the corner flag?

The only other structure at the ground is the stand which runs down the halfway line from the opposite side of the clubhouse down to the other corner flag. Without wishing to sound negative, in reality, its more of a shack than a stand, it has tubular white poles holding the corrugated roof up at 5 yard intervals. There are 3 rows of red seats which unfortunately are almost at the same height (so most people tended to sit on the front row).

The other 3 sides of the ground are completely open with hard standing running behind the advertisement boards and the metal railed fence. Theres plenty of room to build a two tier cantilever stand on the M6 side of the ground for when Athletic enter the Champions League (which isn't going to be too long I'm informed). The pitch is pretty good but it does have a downward slope towards the motorway side of the ground. It was time to have a read of the programme, they had about 20 odd of them available from the turnstiles and although the publication had a nice bright cover it was a bit lightweight in content for the £1.50 asking price. The highlight was the page titled 'Match Action' which had 3 pictures of players ambling about doing nothing much at all, weird, I know my pictures aren't exactly sports page fodder but these were really naff, perhaps they'd deleted the good ones and put the rubbish ones in by mistake? The gate today was only 56, normally its less, I suppose there were about 20 odd from Maine Road boosting the attendance, hopefully numbers may start to rise for Ashton if they put a few results together, they won away at AFC Liverpool in midweek. Times have been hard for the home side in recent seasons, after last term they only retained Premier Division status because of a club going bust and another failing ground grading requirements. As for Maine Road they've lost both of their opening games this season (at Barnoldswick and Bacup Borough), word from the regulars is that they deserved better but its nil points on the doors at the moment. The first half was very scrappy indeed.

Neither side controlled the ball and there was an abundance of mistimed passes and poor first touches. Ashton had the better opportunites going forward and took a 1-0 lead just before the break with a weak looking effort from Lee Barratt creeping past the keeper. Maine Road must have been disappointed with their efforts in the last quarter of the pitch, time and time again they continually squandered decent approach play.

Bang on half time I managed to get in the Tea Hut queue with only 1 bloke in front of me. He had ordered a couple of pies and some hot drinks. Unbelievably it was apparent that the pies weren't properly warm! The girl in the hut took an age to sort the problem out, I think she was using a microwave and a camp fire at one stage? Needless to say I lost interest after about 8 minutes and thought sod-it! If you cannot serve 1 person 2 pies and 2 tea's in that kind of time you won't do much business. Surely the approach of half time warrants some type of tea hut preparation?...especially the bare basics of making sure the pies are warm, its not like we are serving up Anfield proportions. Fortunately the football improved a bit in the second half.

Maine Road put some increasing pressure on the Ashton defence but, to the home sides credit, they mopped everything up convincingly. Maine Road were still struggling with that final touch or the accuracy of the important pass, it must have been frustrating for Ian Walker the Manager. This Ashton Athletic side are an almost completely different set of players from last season and Steve Wilkes has brought in a tough attitude to fight 100% for every win, its even on the cover of the programme, the spirit amongst the Ashton players was very evident, they battled to hold on to that 1 goal advantage and matched Maine Road every step of the way.

The visitors changed a few things around midway through that second half and brought on some very young players, the lads didn't disgrace themselves and did ok against their more experienced counterparts. I'm not sure these lads got the nod because of injuries or whether the youth policy takes priority, without being critical, it was going to be very hard for such young lads to change things around in the way it was needed. Ashton sealed the victory with a penalty in the 85th minute from Jacob Wood. In fairness 2-0 appeared about right to me, Ashton battled to the end and had a better completion rate. Such a pity for some of the Maine Road players who performed well on the day, Alex Jay in particular, one of the best players in this league in my opinion, its a pity too many of his colleagues lacked that final touch on the day.

Ashton are now in nose bleed territory '7th'! Maine Road go bottom (for the time being anyway).

Runcorn Town

2011-08-08T12:07:00.000+01:00

Saturday 6th August
North West Counties League Premier Division
Runcorn Town 2 Padiham 2
Attendance: 93 (no way, my head count was only 63)
Admission: £5
Programme: £1.50
Tea Hut Purchases: Luke warm tea 70p, Multipack bag of crisps 40p
Weather: Started sunny, went dull, remained dry
Parking: In the Pavilions function rooms car park, next to ground.

Take a wrong turning in Runcorn and you could be lost for days. I'd done my revision and memorised the fact that the Match Shed had to take the 4th exit off the Liverpool bound express-way posted for Runcorn Docks. I couldn't trust armchair navigator Frugal Glenn with such important directions regardless of the fact that he was wearing his glasses. Diesel is just too expensive these days. We hit the Runcorn Town ground a bit before expected, 1.45pm in fact. As I slung the Match Shed up against the Pavilions Function Rooms (which just looks like a rather large pub) there was the welcome opportunity of a pint before kick off. As this is the only hostelry for miles around you would think it might be open just before Runcorn Towns first ever game in the NWCL Premier Division, nope.... it was padlocked and very clearly shut. Me and Frugal watched a bit of a local league game on the adjacent pitch to the Runcorn Town ground before we got attracted by the large 'Bar & Lounge' signs just through the gates inside the stadium. We made a B-Line to the turnstiles (new this season I believe) and raced after the arrowed signs for our pints. It was like a treasure hunt... we eventually went past a long blue building and entered into the well advertised 'Bar and Lounge'.

After a couple of minutes walking around what looked like a Tea Hut seating area, opening a couple of broom cupboards, a door to the ladies toilet and stumbling into the committee-only section we were left scratching our heads where this bloody bar was? "Can I help you lads" said a friendly bloke in shirt and tie, we mentioned we were looking for the bar, "Oh there's no bar here" chirped up a nice lady beside an over-smoking griddle pan, "You need to go in the Pavilions for ale". I politely mentioned it was shut, the bloke in the tie cut back in... "They usually open around 4 o-clock unless Man United or Liverpool are playing".

What this had to do with all the Bar and Lounge signs in the ground I do not know? The immensely tight Frugal Glenn had begrudgingly agreed to buy me a drink for my birthday (today), he was made up that a possible 3 quid hit on a pint of fizzy continental lager had now down-sized considerably into a meagre 70p cup of tea, the only liquid on offer! I decided to have a pie as well just to get my moneys worth, "Theres no pies here boys" replied the nice lady again, "I can do a hot sausage though"? I decided to take my cup of tea and get some air. The tea was barely luke warm, almost cold, I'd bought a bag of crisps, I was met with a label on the packet which read, 'this is a Multipack item and is strictly not for resale', you understand why when you get half the content of a normal bag of crisps, oh dear, this was not the best Tea Hut experience I'm afraid. The Runcorn Town ground is apparently being developed to meet the demands of higher status football, to be honest its still got a long way to go.

Work has recently taken place in fitting a new turnstile entrance and a small all seater stand is taking shape down the touchline, it just needs a roof. Down the opposite touchline we have the phantom Bar and Lounge building which in reality is a snack bar seating area and changing rooms facility (might be an idea to remove the Bar & Lounge signs). Further down either side of this building we find a couple of shack-style structures which offer some plastic chairs cemented into what look like flowerpots, on closer scrutiny its cut up plastic piping.

The far end of the ground is out of bounds despite there being some bike shed type cover behind the nets, its probably just as well this end is out of bounds following the number of Padiham players having a slash at the edge of the pitch down there during the warm ups.

The end of the ground nearest the entrance is just hard standing with a handrail to stop you falling down the banking behind you. Theres plenty of rough and ready character at the ground and it brings a certain charm, half the place is surrounded by greenery (ok some of it is weeds and the like) whilst the other half of the ground is overlooked by towering power station looking developments, something quite common around this part of the world. I pity the bloke who was constantly fagging the balls being hoofed out the ground, especially as numerous signs were posted warning people to keep off contaminated land with terms like 'Danger - Corrosive Chemicals'! Here's a bit about todays sides, Runcorn Town got promotion from last seasons Division 1 by finishing runners up with only 2 defeats, they knocked in 114 goals and conceeded just 39. I saw them at the end of last season when they just got pipped in the NWCL Cup Semi Final to the very impressive 'big-money' New Mills side, I have the opinion Runcorn Town will hold their own in this higher division and may even put in a challenge for a top 4 spot. The visitors, Padiham (from over near Burnley way) are a consistently hard side to beat and always provide stern opposition. In my opinion this was Match of the Day in the Premier Division today.

The first half witnessed some fast paced attacking from the home side and the impressive Graeme Mitchell put them 1-0 up with a superb dipping volley (come lob) from well outside the area. Padiham looked to be rocking. I predicted a 4-0 win to a snoozing Frugal Glenn as more waves of attacks swept down on the Padiham goal. It was a shame that there was only a small crowd of locals here to see it, I counted 63 although the official attendance total later referenced 93 (perhaps they included the players). Just when it seemed only a matter of time before Runcorn got the second goal to clinch it, Padiham got a penalty, it was 1-1 and it gave the visitors something to hold onto. Despite Runcorn getting that second goal before the break, the dominance was gone, Padiham passed the ball around and now looked like a side who could put up a challenge. Padiham took this better quality football into the second half and seemed more balanced, Runcorn lost the initiative and a lot of their play became forced and rushed. Padiham quietly went about the business and it was no surprise when they got the equaliser from a fine counter attacking move superbly finished off by Chris Ridehalgh.

Despite further chances at both ends the game finished a bit scrappy but it had been an enjoyable game and I think both these sides will be in the top half of the table longer-term. A draw reflected a fair result. As for the ground-match day-experience, I liked Runcorn Towns place, its not prim and proper but its got character and they are very friendly people, they've come a long way in a short time and I'm sure things will get even better for them. Dont come expecting a pint in that bar though! Perhaps they might add a few pies to the sausages as well one day (although I did see someone with a burger at half time)? Good ground to visit.

Take The 4th Exit for Runcorn Docks

2011-08-06T20:31:00.001+01:00

Saturday 6th August

Went along to watch Runcorn Towns first ever game in the Premier Division of the North West Counties League today. Very friendly people.

Opposition came courtesy of the respected Padiham outfit.

Some good end to end football on offer, pity I couldn't say the same about a pie and a pint?

It ended 2-2. Looked to be a few hoppers taking in the action?

Background and observation notes will feature in the 'Tea Hut' Visit Report which should be posted by Monday lunchtime.

Irlam

2011-08-01T10:50:00.000+01:00

Saturday 30th July
Salford Advertiser Challenge Cup
Irlam 0 Salford City 1
Admission: £2
Attendance: 91 (head count)
Programme: Not today
Tea Hut Purchase: Can of chilled Diet Coke 60p
Weather: Very hot in the sun
Parking: Club car park, easy exit

The Match Shed temperature readout reckoned it was 24 degrees but it felt warmer than that to me and Frugal Glenn. We were like a couple of dodgy beefburgers griddling in the sun. The Match Shed aint got no Sat-Nav type gadgets, I missed the bloody turn again and nearly ended up in the next town. I finished up doing 10 extra miles to get back to Silver Street for the home of Irlam FC. Frugal Glenn was to blame, his side-splitting tales about a few dodgy jobs he'd done in Irlam 10 or so years ago, decorating jobs I mean... not nicking silver or copper piping, he's not that bad. A friendly bloke hanging about near the entrance took 2 pounds each off us for admission. Frugal thought it was a local trickster who would now be on his way to the bookies with our pound coins. The chap was nothing of the sort.

The ground looked a nice set up in the hot July sun, not sure if it would have the same pleasant ambience for a Tuesday night kick off in the middle of January? All the buildings are located in the corner of the ground adjacent to the entrance. A brick built changing room block, a shipping container (come) tea hut jobby, a small 'flat-pack' seated stand which straddles the 18 yard area down the touchline and a low covered terrace behind the nets (running from near the goalposts out to the corner flag).

The rest of the ground is open to the elements. There are quite a good number of advertisement boards around the pitch and all areas have decent hard standing complimented by a set back concrete slab section-style perimeter wall. The pitch looked nice and trim and more or less flat (which would prove to be a slightly incorrect judgement based upon what was to happen during the second half). Irlam is a town between Manchester and Warrington and they ply their trade in Division 1 of the North West Counties League, Salford City play in the Evo Stik Northern Premier League Division 1 North a couple of steps above them. Salford were unbeaten in their pre season friendly campaign and rumour has it they look capable of doing rather well in the league this season. Salfords manager is Rhodri Giggs, Ryans brother. The first half set off at a pace and Irlam soon put the visitors under some early pressure. Things slowed down in the energy sapping heat midway through the half and Salford started to apply their passing game, I suppose 0-0 at half time was a fair scoreline, it was certainly competitive.

I joined a long queue in the Tea Hut for some half time refreshment, it appeared everybody in front of me was ordering varying numbers of £1.50 hot dogs, a real best seller for sure, strange because they just looked like those cheap ones you get from the supermarket? I'd had 3 hot dogs for my tea yesterday so I just got a can of coke from the fridge, it was too hot for warm drinks. The woman behind the counter kept yelling out "does anybody want hot dogs", I think she was on the verge of getting the can-opener on another tin? They like their hot dogs in this part of the world. A couple of forlorn pies rested in the warming cabinet, obviously out of fashion on a scorcher like today. We were soon back with the action, Salford bossed the whole of the second half and Irlam struggled to create chances.

The inevitable Salford goal arrived in the 65th minute courtesy of a well hit shot from Matt Cross. The keeper had it covered but the ball took a wicked spiked bounce in the 6 yard area and shot up into the roof of the net. The freak goal sent the Salford hordes into dreamland (hordes = 6 blokes in orange replica shirts behind the nets). We got the usual mass substitutions after that and Salford held onto the 1 goal advantage with some nice sections of progressive passing football, they look to have a decent squad. The win heralded the fourth successive time Salford have won this annual 'Salford Advertiser Challenge Cup' game with Irlam in the 4 years its been in operation. Thats 1 trophy in the cabinet for Rhodri Giggs already. More than what Ryan will be able to boast about come next May?

Irlam lose the Cup!

2011-07-30T19:43:00.002+01:00

Irlam lost the 2011 Salford Advertiser Cup by a single goal today.
Evo Stik NPL Division 1 North dark horses Salford City continued some pretty impressive pre-season form with a freak second half strike to take the trophy.
Me and Frugal Glenn battled tropical conditions just off junction 11 of the M60 to see it happen.
The new style cut-down visit report will be on here Monday morning (ish).

FC Halifax Town

2011-07-24T20:31:00.001+01:00

Saturday 23rd July
Pre Season Friendly
FC Halifax Town 0 Mansfield Town 1
Attendance: 743
Admission: £7
Programme: £1.50 (Not worth it)
Tea Hut purchase: Not at those prices!
Weather: Sunny and warm
Parking: Roadside, about 5 minutes away

Following a Friday night of spicy Indian food and a rash abundance of ale, perhaps I wasn't as keen for my Saturday afternoon football as normal. Todays destination was The Shay home of a resurgent FC Halifax Town, also known as The Shaymen. There's plenty of hype about at the moment that Fax are going to mop up in the Blue Square Conference North this season? Time will tell. Here's a bit of travel sludge.... I swung the Match Shed over the A58 passing dozens of African people all dressed in flowing white robes (honest), this strange site expanded as I witnessed them heading off over the rocky slopes of Blackstone Edge, what they were doing I do not know? Next up came the illegal windsurfers on the reservoir behind the famous White House pub, a great place for grub which is slap bang on the Pennine Way. Despite numerous big signs stating 'Strictly No Water Sports-This Is Your Drinking Water', the late twenties / middle thirties adventure seekers set a fine example, nice one yuppies. Dropping down into the county of Yorkshire the Match Shed fumed at being stuck behind a long line of slow moving traffic, some 1930's tractor was doing 10 mph all over the road. How satisfying that the relic wasn't carrying number plates or tax, made me wonder the number of years this farmer must have been getting away with it? I had to overtake six cars of OAP's and those silly women that struggle to drive 4 x 4's to finally get past Owd Ned (fag in slack jaw) and his smoking tractor. I gave him the fingers just before hitting the regeneration 'targeted' town of Sowerby Bridge, with its converted Mills and abundant restaurants and takeaways I'm not sure if all the effort on selling this old community as the next best thing is actually working? I was soon in Halifax, it looks a nice town if you take the Saville Park road down to The Shay, all big stone houses and well kept area's of greenery. If you take one of the other roads you soon realise Saville Park is the kind of area that is currently in a minority in this once fine borough. Sadly Halifax appears to be a bit rundown at the moment (but we could say that about a lot of places in broken Britain couldn't we). I parked the Match Shed up just across the junction from the old bus garage adjacent to the ground. Already there were middle aged blokes hurrying down the road in their replica tops, The Shaymen are a popular product in this part of the world.

The Shay Stadium rises up before you and the recently opened Main Stand is a splendid addition to this proud little ground. I remember coming here years ago when there was a speedway track and a couple of ramshackle stands, some dodgy grass banks and bugger all else. To say it had an open aspect would be an understatement. What we have now is a truly decent ground befitting Football League status. Its lost that humble rough and ready quirkyness that did have its own unique charisma but its been swopped for a big main stand with great views and two large covered terraces at each end of the pitch. The old Skircoat Lane stand is still there, all seater now rather than the part terrace it once had but its still got all the stanchions to block your view if you are still hanging on and hankering for the past. The supporters bar next to the main stand entrance reminded me a bit of the KC Stadium at Hull City. Not many ale heads today it seemed, after all, it is a friendly and all that. A very friendly chap took my 7 pounds at the turnstile and I was in. Despite a heavy presence of stewarding nobody took offence at my camera bag or me taking pictures inside the stadium. Must say the pitch looked immaculate, almost like a bowling green.

The sun was out and The Shay looked mighty fine, dont get me wrong I wouldn't like to come to a place like this every week, I like moving around a ground and taking in different views from uncrowded environments, you cannot do that here (unfortunately), today for instance witnessed all the Halifax supporters in one half of the main stand only, both of the terraces behind each end were closed (I dont think you could transfer if they were open? Not sure about that?). The away support from Mansfield were placed in the corner of the opposite stand on Skircoat Lane. A bit over the top really as there were only about 50 or 60 Mansfield supporters. It will be interesting to see whether Halifax enforce strict segregation in the Blue Square Conference North? I favour freedom to roam all parts but maybe thats not possible at a place like this? As the Shaymen support grew before kick off it was noticeable that there is a buzz and a feeling of positive anticipation about the place. They seem keenly focused on doing well this season and have a confidence they have the right manager and the right kind of squad to succeed. A factor that must be brought into this equation is the apparent loss of one of the Shaymens best players, Jamie Vardy, he wasn't in the squad today, rumour had it that this was because he's on his way to a new club?. I settled down in my seat and pretty soon felt uncomfortable in my double jumper clothing, the trouble is its always a bit chilly up on the hills where I live, down at The Shay it was bloody boiling. I like the Halifax kit, its all blue features are set off by a vertical retro style stripe on the shirts, as for Mansfield, they adopted a very snazzy all yellow and old gold number which was spoiled by a blue sleeve running down from the collar. Don't like those odd sleeve style numbers, old school uniformity wins for me every time. Once we got underway the action was a bit slow paced to be honest, it was a friendly match remember and it was very hot down at pitchside.

As the game wore on I was able to make a few tentative observations (which may prove to be a load of tosh), I thought Halifax looked weak up front and lacked any kind of clinical finishing, they also appeared hesitant in defence, I thought Mansfield missed some clear cut opportunities in the first half especially. What Halifax do appear to have is some decisive midfield spirit, Tom Baker in particular was spraying the ball about and also battling in the tackle, he looks a good player. Mansfield put a few nice passing moves together as they occasionally pressed forward, they did look solid and I got the impression (for them) this match was more about fitness and strategy coaching rather than win at all costs. Half time arrived and it was 0-0. The side effects of too much Friday night beer and some Indian meal I could no longer remember the name of had 'at long last' started to yield. I fancied a look at that Tea Hut under the stand. Oh dear!

On arrival at the brightly lit characterless counter and sale boards (just across from the bogs), my heart sank. There in bright lights was the exuberant price list, Tea was a mind-blowing £1.70, a small pie was £2.80 and the burgers started at £2.90! I felt sorry for the Shaymen supporters having to put up with this daylight robbery every other week. A club needs an honest, decent, reasonably priced Tea Hut, its part of the matchday experience, sadly the Shaymen won't be getting anything like that! I reckon the Mansfield fans would have (possibly) been given access to a notoriously dodgy burger van in the stand they occupied, I cannot confirm this and dont wish to speculate, however, BSN clubs should check out facilities before travelling this season, you may wish to hit a local chippy instead of pigging out at the ground? Needless to say, I did not give in to these silly (and insulting) rip off prices and I bought bugger all.

The second half saw the usual friendly-match multiple changes and the usual fragmentation of what we had as a match. Perhaps the best 2 players who came on for Halifax in that second period were Simon Garner and 'Deano' (James Dean I think). Mansfield got the only goal just after the break and they held on for the win despite some Halifax pressure in the last 15 minutes, in my humble opinion this match should have been a draw but credit to The Stags they closed the game down and made sure they protected that 1 goal lead. Mansfield manager Paul Cox looks to have implemented some fundamental standards of method and organisation on the pitch, both of these principles became evident in the way they never lost a grip on the proceedings, surely this will improve The Stags performance levels ongoing.

Having been to The Shay to see what all the fuss was about I honestly reckon they will be a big plus for the Conference North this season. For one thing, they'll take a lot of away support everywhere they go. As for clubs visiting The Shay, they'll play at a very good ground, perhaps the players might appreciate it a bit more than visiting fans though, especially if they are in the corner of the old stand with only the dodgy burger van for half time sustenance? Perhaps things might be ok if they open up more of the stadium. Its a place worth going to and a lot of the time I reckon it will be a fortress for Halifax, I cannot see many away sides doing the business in that environment, it will be a test and more often than not a hard fought slog. The Shaymen mean to give it a good go, it should be interesting stuff over the coming weeks.

Shay Stadium

2011-07-23T20:45:00.000+01:00

Went to see what all the fuss was about today.
Apparently this new Halifax team are better than the 1970 Brazilian side.
Mansfield Town provided the humble opposition.

The 'Tea Hut Visit Report' lowdown on the FC Halifax Town experience will be on here late Sunday / early Monday.

Altrincham

2011-07-18T12:59:00.001+01:00

Saturday 16th July
Pre Season Friendly
Altrincham 1 Manchester City XI 2
Attendance: 1,298
Admission: £7 (almost half the price of league games)
Programme: £1 (ok for the money)
Tea Hut Purchase: Tea at £1.50 (poor)
Parking: One of the few spaces on Moss Lane itself
Weather: Pre match showers, then dry with sunny spells

As per usual on a wet Saturday afternoon, thousands of people with very little to do head for the Trafford Centre shopping complex, the Manchester shrine to stuffy crowded malls with lots of overpriced shops selling daft clothes. Each to their own I say, but the down side for those with a mind of their own is the ridiculous traffic gridlock on the M60 that just happens to be positioned slap bang next to the monstrocity. If, like me, you just want to get to a football match in Altrincham 30 to 40 miles away you end up spending 45 minutes extra travel-time on the Manchester motorway than you really need to. Frugal Glenn has refused to go on any car trip involving the M60 on a wet Saturday until further notice, its bad for the environment he says (and he's that kind of guy). In other words he's had a rollicking off his Mrs and he's been banished to a DIY world of cheap vinyl silk emulsion and 8 walls of hell, serves him right for coming back 2 hours after curfew with an 'Al Sami' deluxe kebab. Anyway, lets get on with it. I eventually hit Altrincham and managed to find the Moss Lane ground easier than expected. A five minute walk up the road and I was right outside the stadium. Across the street dozens of City fans where scoffing grub outside a bulging 'Barneys Fish & Chip Shop'. I was tempted, and I mean really tempted, but no, I wanted to sample Tea Hut stuff from inside the ground.

What a catastrophic massive mistake! Anyone who read my slamming of FC Uniteds (or should I correctly say Bury FC's Gigg Lane) tea hut 'pie of choice' last season will know of my abject lack of enthusiasm for 'Wrights Pies'. Guess what, as soon as I paid my 7 quid to get in, I see 2 tea huts, one at each end of the ground and both of them have big coloured signs up promoting the very same brand of pie.

The club even had pitchside advertisement boards up claiming "Love Football, Love Wrights Pies", what a shocker! To think I'd turned down Barneys take away fish platter, with chips, peas and curry for this desert storm of Pie atrocity was beyond belief and to be honest..... killed a bit of the day for me personally. I got a tea in a paper cup instead. The rip off price of £1.50 (no cup of tea should be over £1) witnessed my receipt of brown hot water totally devoid of taste. Not a great start. As I grimly sipped the hot water I watched on as numerous unsuspecting City fans threw half eaten pies in the waste bins. Good luck to Wrights Pies if they can sell them and people enjoy them, perhaps the Alty fans love em and its just me that doesn't quite appreciate them? My gripe is that I missed out on the fish and chips outside the ground, I made my choice so its my fault. Going back to the admission price, I dont mind paying 7 quid to see one of the favourites for the Conference North playing (supposedly) some of the best young players in the country (even if a lot of them are from overseas). My choice of taking in a visit to Altrincham now rather than in the actual season is purely based upon price. I was surprised (if thats the right word) to find that Altrincham are charging £12 & £13 to watch them in the league. Thats far too much for the Conference North level. Altrinchams reasoning is that they want to maintain a viable budget to achieve success? A very heavy rain shower hit the ground before kick off and it sent people scarpering, the Alty squad stuck it out going through their pre match exercise routines, City were having none of it and kept dry under the stand.

Moss Lane is a very nice ground, there is a tall and narrow Main Stand straddling the half way line with a smaller stand by its side at the 18 yard area. Down the opposite touchline is a good covered terrace running the full length of the pitch.

The town end of the ground also has a fully covered terrace, the other end of the ground is an open terrace but it seemed a nice spot to stand when the sun popped out. I must say the pitch looked first class and the whole set up was very appealing, it has that proper football ground feel to it. I had a look in the Main Stand before kick off but unless you get a central seat which were mainly taken or reserved for season ticket holders the wing areas are in the obstructed view category, this results from the large sides of the stand and the floodlight poles getting in the way. I decided to watch the first half near the halfway line on the covered terrace on the other side of the pitch. A decent crowd of 1,298 had gathered, it appears a lot of the City supporters had been enticed by the likes of Craig Bellamy, Michael Johnson and Nedrum Onuora being named in the squad. Wayne Bridge was also down to play by all accounts but rumours were going around that he'd refused to turn out? Not sure if thats true or not? 90 seconds into the action Altrincham went 1-0 up from a penalty, what a great start for them.

Bellamy started buzzing about for City and they soon applied lots of pressure with some neat short-passing football. This style of play looked fine and dandy but the Alty defence was mopping it up pretty well, it looked like City were intent on walking the ball into the net. Not much opportunity arose for Altrincham attacking but they did look sharp on the odd counter thrust. Despite some good defending and Alty's midfield closing down play City got a couple of goals before the break to take a 2-1 half time lead. It turned to grey skies again and although the rain kept off it did get a little cooler.

The second half saw Bellamy subbed on the hour and after that both sides made multiple changes, even Alty were using a lot of trial players as the game wore on. Inevitably this impacted on the pattern of the game, it all got a bit scrappy and disjointed to be honest.

With around 15 minutes left people started drifting off. Its hard to judge the potential of both sides from this type of encounter. Alty have some decent players and I would expect them to be there at the business end of the season battling for some success, as for Citys development players, yes, some of them are good footballers but I have a nagging doubt only a very small percentage of them will see first team action in the future. This maybe more to do with the finances and immediate needs of MCFC rather than an academy players true merits, we will see? I think the same City squad are taking on Stalybridge Celtic this coming Wednesday, that may bring some interesting comparisons.

Main summary points of my visit to Moss Lane:

Not impressed with the tea hut fayre.

I went today at 7 quid-in because I wont pay £13 for Conference North stuff when the season starts (call me tight if you like).

I reckon Moss Lane is a great looking football ground.

The Alty supporters are a keen and informed bunch and will be expecting a return to the higher division.

They also have an excellent website (well worth a look for general non-league addicts).

Craig Bellamy goes to Altrincham shocker!

2011-07-16T21:12:00.000+01:00

Well, ok, it was as part of the Manchester City XI Academy mob not as Alty's latest signing. Still a sight to be seen though, a (rumoured) 90 grand a week footballer down at Moss Lane (is that really what he's on)?

My visit report on Altrincham v City will be on here late Sunday or early Monday.

Old Standians

2011-07-13T12:09:00.001+01:00

Tuesday 12th July

Pre Season Friendly

Old Standians 1 Ramsbottom United 3

Attendance: 39 (head count)

Admission: £2
Programme: Nope
Tea Hut Purchase: Tea in a freshly washed pot for 50p

Weather: Dry, a bit cloudy, slight chill later on

Parking: Nearby side street, small car park gridlocked

I had to do a few Starsky and Hutch manoeuvres in the Match Shed before tonights game, I'd taken a wrong turning off Bury New Road and found myself in Radcliffe town centre. I had 15 minutes before the big game kicked off at the Ringley Road home of the Old Standians. A couple of dodgy 'U' turns got the Shed back on the flight plan (despite a few shaking heads from the locals). Its not an easy place to find, it was made welcome by a well positioned portable road sign by the side of the A667.

The tiny lane leading into a totally gridlocked car park meant side street parking but it was just over the main road and only a couple of minutes walk. I parked up behind a car with a Southport FC sticker in the back, my Spurs tax disc holder was in fine company. This looked a very nice affluent area with lots of big houses, a fine setting for a ground that was set up as a memorial to the old Stand schoolboys from Stand Grammar School who bravely gave their lives in the Second World War. Originally the team was for Old Standians from the school, however, with the school closed this rule has been relaxed. As we look at things in the present day, this friendly little club has already started on a development plan, they currently reside in the Lancashire Amatuer League and have plans to move forward ongoing. It was 2 quid to get in, the bloke at the table by the gate kindly explained that my ticket also put me in the half time raffle for a bottle of wine.

The ground is nice and tidy with open greenery everywhere, the pitch is mostly metal railed with a few advertisement boards, any gaps are dealt with by red and white tape. The only structure is a white painted clubhouse spanning half across the main road end of the ground, this houses the changing rooms and a welcome internal tea hut facility with tables and chairs. A good few Rammy supporters made up most of the small crowd, they seemed to be picking the bones out of last Saturdays 2-1 defeat at AFC Darwen whilst eagerly looking forward to the coach the club had put on for next weekends friendly in North Wales over at scenic little Conwy.

On the pitch, Glenn Moses was putting the Ramsbottom squad through their paces, it looked a mix of regulars and trialists. Glenn resigned as manager of Atherton Laburnam Rovers at the end of last season, he will be a positive addition to the existing Ramsbottom coaching team. Once underway, the first half was more than a bit scrappy with the visitors having most of the possession, nothing much took the eye and it was little surprise that half time arrived with a 0-0 scoreline. Time to check that tea hut out. I had a reasonably priced cup of tea in a proper mug for 50p. They had a nice little pie cabinet on the counter crammed full with Hollands meat and potatoe pies, they looked good as well. The lady behind was trying to drum up trade by shouting out "come on get your pies, they're only a pound". It was a tempting offer and one well worth a pound, the problem I had was the enormous bowl of spaghetti bolognese I'd scoffed down before setting off for the game, I was still pretty full.

I'm pleased to report that the second half was a much better game and very competitive, not a nasty challenge to be seen either, the referee tonight had a very good game I reckon, he certainly let things flow and nothing got over-heated. Ramsbottom put some good moves together and scored a couple of scorching long distance goals, Old Standians kept in the game and battled extremely hard, they certainly deserved their goal (they nearly got a couple more). It ended up 1-3 to Ramsbottom and they look to have some good young players, the pick of the bunch was Grant Spencer, he only played the second half but he was quick, strong and certainly pretty good on the passing and shooting, he looks a good midfield player. A pleasant enough visit all in all, good luck to Old Standians in their efforts to push the club forwards, as for Ramsbottom, it will be interesting to see what the squad boils down to come the start of the season. A lot of people are tipping them to win the North West Counties League this season? There were a few glimpses of real quality in that second half, bring it on.

Marsden

2011-07-10T20:44:00.001+01:00

Saturday 9th July
Early Doors Pre Season Friendly
Marsden 1 Pontefract Collieries 2
Attendance: 44 (head count)
Admission: Free (hence the presence of Frugal Glenn)

Programme: In your dreams!

Tea Hut purchase: Nothing going today
Weather: Mild blue sky, odd cloud, nice sunshine

The trusty Match Shed recently taxed and M.O.T'd for the new season (ouch) gently ambled over the rolling Saddleworth hills en-route for semi rural Marsden. Frugal Glenn loves the pre season friendlies, especially those which offer free admission, he'd jumped at the offer of an early season loosener on a bright Saturday afternoon. He'd just got back from a caravan holiday to Blackpool (I believe the actual site he stayed at was just outside Preston). He was mighty pleased with the pair of Debenhams Action Slacks he'd got from a seconds outlet near the Central Pier, just off the Golden Mile, apparently the crimplene pants only set him back £3.99, they even had an elasticated waist band, he said the purchase had made his holiday. As I swung the Match Shed on a left turn out of the picturesque village of Delph we started the long climb up towards Marsden Moor. Just outside the village we passed one of the most scenic little cricket grounds in the whole of England, the road takes you up by a drop on your left hand side and there nestling below is the serene vista of Delph and Dobcross Cricket Club surrounded by lush green hills and picturesque rural charm, A game was taking place and there were more spectators watching from the roadside than in the ground, its a great view from the side of the hill. We had to crack on and soon the Match Shed was dodging suicide sheep as they casually ambled across the 50 miles an hour traffic. Having ran over a suicide sheep a few years ago they dont half cause a lot of damage to the under carriage of your car (my particular suicide sheep ran from behind a blind moorland wall with around 6 of its mates, it went straight under the radiator before I even got my foot on the brake, I got less than five yards notice).

15 minutes beyond Delph we dropped into Marsden, famous for the Standedge Tunnel which offers canal and rail routes deep under the moors. The little semi rural town looked a picture in the July sunshine, I parked the Match Shed adjacent to the ground and we took a stroll into the centre (5 minutes away). It was all a bit 'high class charity shop, fish & chips and people drinking ale outside the pub', pleasant but quite you could say. Marsden resides amongst some exceptional South Pennines countryside and its a popular spot for walkers just off the main Oldham to Huddersfield road. We got back to the Fall Lane ground, home of The Cuckoo's at ten to three, some bloke on a small tractor mower had just finished cutting the grass.

A reasonable crowd of around 40 odd people were dotted around the white railed pitch, the only structure at Marsden FC is the well worn wooden looking clubhouse behind the Chinese Chippy end of the ground. It has a bit of a veranda before it gives way to the path leading to the groundsmans shed. I got a bottle of Budweiser (the inferior USA one rather than the better Czech variety) for £2.20 (double-ouch), I was a bit dry and it was that or a choice of a can of warm Carling or that horrible over-hyped Magners stuff. I have to say I am not a fan of football friendlies, especially early July ones but its better than nothing and I'll take it every time. There is no premise or expectation of fine quality football, lets be honest, its nothing more than a training loosener for most clubs, it just gets you into the groove for the new season, todays game would be judged accordingly. As the teams lined up for kick off Frugal Glenn was quick to spot the celebrity referee, I know the music business isn't all it once was but we didn't expect Rod Stewart to be refereeing Marsden v Pontefract today! Was it him, Frugal thought it was but he's not had an eye test for 8 years. It certainly looked like him, perhaps he might be doing a few numbers back in the clubhouse after the game? Frugal started singing 'The First Cut Is The Deepest' when there was a nasty clash of heads in the 13th minute. If they'd done a programme I'd have got it autographed. If it wasn't Rod, it was a dead-ringer and a very good copy.

The game slowly unravelled from a promising start into the 'hoof, charge and shout' disorder normally associated with friendlies so early in the season. It appeared that Marsden had invested in some silver looking match balls of a similar quality you usually see 5 year old kids knocking about on a holiday beach (before a gust of wind speeds them away towards the tide 500 yards away). Both sides were hoofing the ball out of the ground at an alarming rate and various players were complaining that the balls "just weren't right".

As the Fall Lane Ground lies directly open, elevated and adjacent to a busy unfenced side street you can imagine the mayhem of unsuspecting weekend drivers out for a quite country drive suffering the sudden shock of a 100mph centre-backs clearance smack bang on the half opened passenger window! The game itself witnessed Ponte taking the majority of first half possession which in turn brought a 1-0 lead, the commitment was present (from both sides) but a lot of moves broke down far too early. Marsden moved up a gear in the second half and realised there wasn't that much between the sides so why not have a go. They justly got the equaliser and could easily have stolen it. Instead Ponte used that extra bit of class to drive forward once again, they got the winner around ten minutes from the death. Marsden only have themselves to blame that they didn't get a draw out of this game especially when they fluffed an absolute nailed on '5 yard-out-sitter' just before the end, how the lad missed it I do not know? A credit to the fine location of Marsdens Fall Lane Ground was the number of passing walkers and hikers who stopped by to take in some of the action as they passed through the valley, many of them taking photographs, amongst such striking scenery it makes you realise what a nice little place this is to have a football ground.

First game of the season today, MARSDEN

2011-07-09T20:15:00.000+01:00

Me and Frugal Glenn did Marsden v Pontefract Collieries today, the first Tea Hut game of the new season. Ponte took it 2-1 but Marsden fluffed some sitters. The visit report will be up sometime Sunday evening. Thank goodness we've got some football back!

Some great looking friendlies on Saturday 9th July

2011-07-05T21:55:00.000+01:00

I'm tempted by some tasty dishes from the Specials Board this coming Saturday.
Will I finally cast off the out of season blues and get back behind the controls of the Match Shed (Its due for an M.O.T on Thursday by the way)?
Lets have a look at the Wheres the Tea Hut menu blurb ....................

AFC Darwen v Ramsbottom United (Rammy's big season loosener)
Airbus v FC United (Uniteds European Tour)
Altrincham v Burnley (£7 admission, get it while you can here)
Prestwich Heys v Salford City (Salford may well be on the upgrade)
Lostock St Gerrard v Barnoldswick Town (Great photo opportunities)
Marsden v Pontefract Collieries (Classy NCEL opposition)

Lets hope I can shake off the wife for a couple of hours this Saturday afternoon. Surely there's a limit to how many times someone can get told off? Goodness knows how Frugal Glenn is going on???

Glastonbury

2011-06-26T21:29:00.000+01:00

Oh dear

Retro old-school football programmes

2011-06-24T20:08:00.000+01:00

I threatened to post some old Division 1 programmes from the Dark Side of the Moon , well here they come............

All of these come from the Tea Hut 1965-66 collection.

Pre Season Friendly Options?

2011-06-17T19:58:00.002+01:00

Looking around the ever increasing listings of next seasons avant-garde Pre Season Friendlies I became tantalisingly transfixed on a slightly different approach. Instead of going to games here, there and everywhere amidst lots of clubs from various and widely random leagues, why not put a common denominator in place? Why not ensure that a club from one (and the same) quality league were always present in the respective fixture. Well, I had a go at it. The winning chosen league was the North West Counties League (by the way, they've lost the Vodkat tag now). I'm not 100% sure on commiting to this idea yet but I've picked out a selection of eclectic non league friendlies concerning NWCL clubs all in the month of July 2011. I might just take it on, there are a mix of charismatic standards and locations all being thrown in the mixer.... there are bound to be some worthwhile nuggets in there. Lets see how things transpire.

Here is a listing of my Pre Season Friendly research (and dates) for North West Counties League club involvement:

JULY

Saturday 2nd Prestatyn Town v AFC Liverpool

Saturday 9th Lostock St Gerrards v Barnoldswick Town

Wednesday 13th Silsden v Bradford City

Saturday 16th Longridge Town v Ashton Athletic

Saturday 23rd Prestwich Heys v Maine Road

Thursday 28th Buckley Town v Runcorn Linnets

Saturday 30th Llandudno v Stone Dominoes

Mid Summer Bobbins

2011-06-15T19:26:00.000+01:00

Gonna sort out my Pre Season Friendly visits over the next week or so, I know a lot of people don't rate them (some groundhoppers wont be caught dead at them) but I tend to class them the same as hangover tablets. If you need them badly enough you'll damn well take them.

Mid summer non-football period is really taking its toll. I tried to get back into a bit of cricket recently but when they all tramped off because it got a bit cloudy I realised it wouldn't be practical, especially not where I live.

Dug out an old 'football programme' objective yesterday. Some years ago I started off attempting to attain a home programme for every First Division Football League Club for every season from 1965-66 through to 1974-75. Please note younger readers, this was Pre Premier League times when the First Division was numbero-uno in English football top-turkeyism. Checking how far I got..... I'm round-about two thirds of the way there. I even bagged a couple of late sixties programmes on eBay today (just to keep my hand in). I reckon the boring summer will see me trying to progress this even further. Hopefully I might even post a few pictures of recent acquisitions on here (now that WILL be exciting). Its better than nothing at all I suppose.

Its rained for 50 days and 50 nights

2011-06-12T19:50:00.001+01:00

After yet another wet, cold, miserable mid June day the mind looks for small positives. I'm afraid there are hardly any in sight. For the 5th year running the summer weather around the western upper edge of the South Pennines has been absolute PANTS.
How ironic the eastern side of the country is apparently enduring a drought (which will doubtless put 'yet-more-ridiculous' price hikes into gear). Some smug home-counties woman from BBC News said we might run out of food next winter and we're all going to die. They have it rough down south don't they. They stopped reporting on North West weather during the Thatcher period. Its usually pretty cr*p in any case so we don't tend to bother.
Anyway, I've got a new lake to look at in my back garden, the cats a bit miffed because thats where he usually does his business.
I've got two wooly jumpers on at the moment and double socks, its 8 degrees max. Good job we haven't caved in to those daft calls for summer football, there wouldn't be a game on today, they'd all be waterlogged. Whats gone wrong with our weather system? It seems to get steadily worse every year.

Prestatyn Town

2011-05-16T20:43:00.002+01:00

Sunday 15th May
Welsh Premier League Europa League Play Off Semi-Final
PRESTATYN TOWN 2 PORT TALBOT TOWN 1
Attendance: 383
Admission: £7
Programme: £1.50
Tea Hut purchases: Cornish Pasty £1.70, Tea 80p
Weather: Cloudy with a bit of light rain, stiff breeze at times
Parking: Side street off Bastion Road, 5 minutes walk, easy exit

Where I live up on the Pennines it has rained on and off (more on than off) for the last 11 days (every single day), hard to believe some parts of the UK have been bone dry? Todays 'pants' weather forecast put the mockers on what could have been a nice day by the seaside. Even the North Wales coast got the rain, it also got a chilly stiff breeze blowing in off the sea, not deckchair stuff by any means, yet again I put my winter woolies and waterproofs on. Looks like summers been and gone. Frugal Glenn wasn't on board the Match Shed today but he'd endured a compulsory caravan holiday in Prestatyn a couple of years back so he'd given me a good idea where the Bastion Gardens Stadium was. Apparently he was so traumatised by the confined holiday sleeping arrangements and the relentless campsite 24/7 bingo he couldn't face being within 20 miles of the place. I think Prestatyn is a decent little place really. I made the journey in good time travelling down a remarkably quiet M56, skirting north of Chester and then taking the coast road down through Flint. I was soon walking beside the open green leisure areas adjacent to the ground.

5 minutes further on I was able to take in the majestic view of the expanse of the Irish Sea as it stormed in on mile upon mile of golden sands, peeping through the broken rain clouds to the south lay the neighbouring resort of Rhyl, beyond that, even further in the grey distance rose the mighty peaks of Snowdonia and the coastal precipice of the Great Orme down at Llandudno. It all looked pretty good in these damp conditions... I wished I'd been lucky enough to see such a view on a sunny day. As I walked back to the ground you realise the football ground resides side by side with Prestatyn Cricket Club (not a bad little cricket ground), its amazing how many football grounds I've been to this season which lie right next to local league cricket pitches. My research for todays game ascertained local media opinions that this was Prestatyn Towns biggest and most important game to date. The clash against classy Welsh Premier League rivals Port Talbot Town was billed as a Europa League Play Off Semi Final, there was no second leg, todays winners would meet the winners of Neath v Aberystwyth Town next Saturday in the Final. Whomever won that final would gain entry to the qualifying stage of the Europa League, who knows where that might end? My mind boggled at the dream like vision of Prestatyn going 3-0 up against Spurs next February? Lets not go there. After sauntering over the nice green field to the seaside-side entrance gate I couldn't help overhear one of the stewards reading the match programme and conversing with the gateman in the admission hut "How the hell are we going to afford European Football" he said, I suppose there's no pleasing some folk?

Perhaps he wanted Prestatyn to concentrate on the Premier League (the Welsh one of course). I paid my 7 quid admission money and also got a decent little programme, it included some good news and views, colour pictures and a rather entertaining column titled 'On The Ball With Robbo Goch', I liked Robbo's jottings and wished we could have more writing like his in match programmes. The programme also advertised a clubhouse evening with Tommy Docherty on Saturday 18th June, you get a 2 course meal and a free glass of wine for £20 a ticket, I bet even Frugal Glenn would have jumped at that opportunity if he was back in that caravan park. It was some time since my morning breakfast of scrambled egg, bacon and toast, I hit the Tea Hut as soon as I got to the clubhouse. Its one of those interior type Tea Huts you see in quite a few clubhouses, this one was positioned in the spacious entrance reception room leading onto the packed bar area. I opted for a cornish style pasty and a cup of tea. Both hit the mark and I've no complaints, good service too, the ladies behind the counter dealt with all the punters promptly and efficiently. Whilst I was scoffing the pasty I took time in reviewing the layout of the ground, basically the only viewing structure at the ground is down one of the touchlines, a low level all seater stand which has 3 rows of bucket seats.

A slight negative is the number of stanchions which appear at regular intervals. Behind the north end of the ground resides the clubhouse and changing rooms but the rest of the ground is just hard standing. There is the standard WPL tv gantry positioned between the dug outs on the touchline opposite the stand. The low level setting doesn't offer fantastic character and I suppose the ground is rather open to the elements blowing in off the sea but it is a pleasant enough place to watch decent quality football. Port Talbot brought a bit of support with them and 20 or so of their more vociferous followers took up a first half position slap bang next to the dignitaries VIP section, perhaps it was the drummer, or perhaps the trumpet player, or come to think of it, the swearing that brought along a couple of local police officers to shadow the proceedings running up to half time? The away supporters looked harmless enough and it wasn't long before the police relocated themselves to the Tea Hut room for cups of tea. The pitch looked in great condition for the end of season but that stiff breeze was definitely favouring the side kicking towards the clubhouse end. In the first half this favoured Port Talbot, they more or less completely dominated the opening 45 minutes of play with precision passing and creative movement going forward.

Prestatyn looked like rabbits in the headlights, surely it was more than just the conditions, they simply couldn't get in the game. The inevitable opening goal went to Port Talbot in the 29th minute via a Lee Surman header, Prestatyn could count themselves lucky that they went in at half time only 1-0 down. Port Talbot had bossed the proceedings completely.

During the break I eventually tracked down the singular toilet facilities at the stadium (not easy I may add), they consist of one urinal and two traps only! Needless to say a pretty long queue of nervously hopping males had gathered in dire need of assistance. This is something the club should improve sooner rather than later. I eventually gave up the long queue and went back during the second half (it was the only way). Apparently, Neil Gibson the Prestatyn player manager gave his side a major rollicking at half time, it must have helped as they came out a totally transformed side for the second half.

Instead of Port Talbot carrying on where they left off they surrendered both territory and midfield possession of the ball, the home side moved forward and expanded confidence with each passing minute, within 10 minutes of the restart Port Talbot looked like a bunch of holidaymakers with dodgy buckets and spades trying to stop the tide coming in, Prestatyn were all over them. The transformation in ascendancy came to fruition in the 84th minute when Paul O'Neill was hampered in the box and Lee Hunt smacked in the penalty. It looked all set for extra time and a delayed getaway, one bloke near me was moaning he would now miss his 5 'o' clock Sunday dinner, he need not have worried, up stepped Prestatyn Town captain Dave Hayes to head home an 88th minute sensational winner. The place went mad.

What a turnaround, I would never have imagined a side as dominant as Port Talbot in that first 45 minutes now being so clinically over-run by a gung-ho Prestatyn side who simply took the whole game by the scruff of the neck and made it happen. What a fantastic victory for them. Since full time I've learned that Prestatyn now face Neath away at 'The Gnoll' next Saturday in the final, it should be quite a game.

Vodkat NWC League Cup Final

2011-05-12T17:39:00.000+01:00

Wednesday 11th May
Vodkat North West Counties League Cup Final
NEW MILLS 0 WINSFORD UNITED 1
Played at Curzon Ashton FC
Attendance: 365
Admission: £6
Programme: £1.50
Tea Hut purchase: None (massive queue)
Weather: Mainly cloudy, chilly with a light breeze
Parking: Stadium car park, quick getaway

This NWCL Challenge Cup Final was held at the initially impressive but chronically concrete Tameside Stadium in Ashton Under Lyne, probably better known as the spacious home of Curzon Ashton FC who ply their trade in the Evo Stik Northern Premier League. Two of this seasons Vodkat North West Counties League main shakers contested the prestigious event, New Mills the Premier League champions and the battlers of Winsford United who finished a very good season in a creditable third position below them. I'd seen the classy New Mills outfit 'just about' get past 'never say die' Runcorn Town in an end to end quality semi-final on Saturday. Winsford had seen off impressive Division 1 league champions AFC Blackpool 2-1 in their respective semi-final. It looked like we were all set for a ding-dong dramatic final (at least on paper). I'd willingly scoffed down a rather large chicken roast dinner with all the trimmings before setting off for the game and I was soon steering a slightly lopsided Match Shed down towards the Frugal Glenn pick up point outside Booze Busters down in the town. Frugal was even more grumpy than normal as he struggled to get his seat belt on, he'd apparently had a row with his wife and hadn't had his tea. Instead, he was carrying 2 bags of cheese and onion crisps, some past the sell-by-date scampi fries and a milky way.

The Match Shed hit Ashton Under Lyne a full hour ahead of schedule, the anticipated rush hour traffic in this eastern part of Greater Manchester never happened (perhaps a sign of the times in coalition doomed Britain). The question was what to do with all the spare time running up to kick off? Its not as if there is a great deal to do once you've parked up in the large Tameside Stadium car park. We decided on paying in and trying out the Function Suite Bar. There were already 20 or so New Mills 'dressed' punters in the room and 1 bloke with a Winsford top on. We got our drinks and sat at one of the big circular wedding reception tables specially fitted out for tonights game with sticky plastic table cloths. The place gradually filled up with a 75/25 mix in favour of New Mills supporters, a ratio which more or less matched what we saw in the stadium when we took up a couple of seats in the Main Stand (no extra charge). The opposite covered terrace across the pitch had been adorned with various New Mills flags of various sizes and quality, perhaps they dont do flags in Winsford, they didn't have any (not even for cup finals). The tannoy was apparently sponsored by Deaf Aid for the night, the last time I had my ears ringing like this was at a 'Who' concert in the 70's, talk about loud, to make it worse they played the absolute worst disco pap music you could ever be so unlucky to suffer, the music was so bad I wondered if it was some kind of pyss-take? Frugal Glenn was financially admiring how the sponsors Vodkat had taken up the in-charge spirit of cutting anything in sight, including the budget for cup final night trimmings, no nice looking girls in skimpy costumes, no fireworks, no give away free samples of dodgy coloured alcoholic liquid, all Vodkat produced was a three foot cardboard advertising board next to the centre circle. It sadly appeared about as much effort had been given to the flimsy 12 page match programme which they fleeced people £1.50 for, damn expensive pen pictures and a couple of cheesy adverts me thinks (because that was more or less all that was in the so called cup final programme), nice old school cover though.

The game started with a flurry of New Mills attacks and Winsford looked all at sea, that first 10 minutes proved crucial to both sides, New Mills failed to get the early goal they had obviously set out for whilst Winsford gradually calmed down and slowly balanced the ship. Sadly after that, apart from a long range Winsford shot which rattled the crossbar, the rest of the first half was very scrappy and devoid of decent football. Winsford were proving to be stubborn opposition for the normally open 'free-flowing' tactics of the league champions. A half time snack attack in the Tea Hut below the main stand was a complete non starter, the queue was massive. Frugal Glenn stuck it out for a cup of tea (probably due to the excessive salt content from all his crisps and stuff) but he was gone for twenty minutes. We stood on the covered terrace opposite the main stand for the second half but it was a bit breezy and quite chilly. Despite all the New Mills flags, there appeared to be more Winsford United supporters over here and they were well voiced in getting behind a much improved side in that second period. Winsford seemed to want the ball more and it was obvious New Mills didn't like the buzz and bite of the proceedings, the normal pacy passing game adopted so often by New Mills was nowhere in sight, it all looked a bit hit and hope, dare I say it...long ball.

It was Winsford United who started to play the better football and more and more possession created more and more chances. The break through came with about 15 minutes to go, a Lee Duckworth free kick 25 yards or so out on the right flank skipped past static defenders and keeper alike to send the Winsford players into leaps of unbridled delight, they were 1-0 up against the bookies nailed on favourites. The expected New Mills fight back spluttered and chugged and never got into gear, if anything its a wonder Winsford didn't go further ahead. New Mills went down to 10 men near the end when Luke Horrocks hastily retaliated to a firm challenge by throwing the ball at his opponents head, his second yellow card meant he had to go. A couple of clear chances fell to Winsford deep into injury time but it wasn't to be, not that they bothered, they'd deservedly won the cup and given their small band of supporters a great deal to cheer about. Well done Winsford United!

Hindsford

2011-05-11T00:32:00.003+01:00

Tuesday 10th May

Manchester League Premier Division

HINDSFORD 1 STOCKPORT GEORGIANS 1

Attendance: 39 (Head Count)

Admission: Free in the Manchester League

Programme: Not available
Tea Hut purchase: None (had a cheese sandwich in the car)

Weather: Bit cloudy, odd shower and sunny spell thrown in

Parking: Grid locked club car park

The Bridgewater Office Supplies sponsored Manchester League offers fantastic value for money, its free to get in! I took up the option of a late visit over to Tyldesley to check out 5th placed Hindsford FC who were playing their last game of the season against top 3 opposition courtesy of the Stockport Georgians. I've heard good reports about the Manchester League and I was looking forward to seeing the Hindsford ground hidden away at the end of Squires Lane, a nice little area which isn't too far from the busy main road which runs through Tyldesley centre. The ground appears just as the lane ends at a footpath which in turn leads onto open meadows and trees, a rather nice setting really. The club car parks sit either side of a metal corrugated building housing a club house and changing rooms directly adjacent to the half way line. This is the only structure at the ground and there is a small roof attached to the front which provides a bit of shelter against the elements.

The rest of the ground is just a post and metal rail around the touchlines with a concrete perimeter fence set well back across the grass viewing areas. One of the ends is no access as the fence pushes in close to the pitch. I'd managed to get the Match Shed parked as close as possible to the car park exit gate but it wasn't long before I was block stacked in as the late comers hap-hazardly grid locked everybody, why dont people park down the street when a car park looks full? It causes chaos when someone wants (or has) to leave early (as happened once or twice tonight). I was lucky to find a way through not long after the final whistle. As regards the action on the pitch, this was a very hard fought energetic encounter with vociferous encouragment from the herds of coaches, assistants and other club members packing out the areas around the galvanised steel dug outs, they almost outnumbered the spectators who had gathered outside the club house. They all spoke the tongue of the sacred non-league football coach, if you've ever been within 20 yards of the dug outs you will doubtless know the phrases. It always appears to me that the players don't understand what they're going on about. I think the coaches enjoy it though.

Some ferocious tackles were going in and a lot of appealing was taking place, credit to the players for taking it in their stride, none of that fancy pants diving and handbags you see from the likes of Arsenal and Co on the tv ...thats for sure. Fair do's to Abid Hussain who was having a fine match as Referee, he kept the game flowing whilst still attaining discipline, not an easy task in such heated surroundings. Stockport Georgians looked the better side going forward in the first half and certainly deserved a 1-0 half time lead, the Hindsford lads were getting stuck in but there was hardly a goal scoring opportunity created in the first 45 minutes.

They received a verbal reality-check at the half time team talk just beside the centre circle. It must have had an impact because they appeared a lot more confident and cohesive on the ball during the second half, the Georgians found themselves under some consistent probing pressure for the first time in the match. The equaliser for Hindsford was a scrappy affair but very well deserved. This seemed to kick start a revival from the Georgians, who still had a chance to go second in the league tonight, it all helped to provide an exciting climax to a pretty decent game of football, I think I'll have some more of this Manchester League stuff come next season!

New Mills

2011-05-08T12:17:00.023+01:00

Saturday 7th May

North West Counties League Challenge Cup Semi Final
New Mills 3 Runcorn Town 2
Attendance: 153
Admission: £6
Programme: £1.50
Tea Hut purchase: Tea at 75p, Frugal Glenns hot dog £1.60
Weather: Sunny spells, mild, a little breezy at times
Parking: On the main road around the corner, easy exit
Getting There:
I picked Frugal Glenn up in the Match Shed, he was stood in the pouring rain dressed in a big army fatigues anorak with his Bacup Borough black and white brolly, the downpour hadn't relented for over two hours. As the Match Shed headed due south through Oldham, Ashton and Stalybridge a chink of bright light appeared on the horizon, by the time we cut through Glossop things had dried up rather well, upon arrival at New Mills they were even playing cricket! It didn't look like it had even rained in the High Peak. We looked like a couple of party poopers from the deep mid winter as people strolled by in t-shirts and shorts.
The Ground:
The unpretentious home of New Mills football club is on Church Lane set back a small distance from the A6015 main road just beside the churchyard. I over shot the turning in the Match Shed and turned around in the conveniently positioned New Mills Cricket Club a couple of hundred yards further down the road. There are a couple of old style open plan turnstiles competently manned by a couple of club-stalwarts eager for your money. I thought it would be the standard 5 quid entrance charge which is normal for the NWCL Premier clubs but New Mills charge £6, perhaps its because they are champions? Frugal was a bit miffed about shelling out an extra quid on top of what he'd been expecting. I decided on one of the programmes the old timer had in a cardboard box, I gave it Frugal to read to stop him sulking. The ground has a small low level covered terrace down the churchyard side touchline, this runs two thirds of the pitch before another low level stand appears with two rows of shiny bucket seats. The pitch slopes gently down to what is titled 'The School End' which is just uncovered hard standing as is the opposite touchline where the dug outs are positioned. There is a large wooden planked perimeter fence running along these sides, you can see the tops of some oldish looking double decker buses popping out behind the fence behind the dug outs. That leaves 'The Club House End' which obviously has a clubhouse plonked behind the nets, this also caters for the changing rooms and a tea hut. One thing noticeable about the ground was the rock hard pitch which looked a bit bobbly and dusty in parts, understandable considering the recent dry spell and this being the end of the season. I'd not say this is a bad ground, its functional and well kept but it does lack a tad of character.
Todays Game:
New Mills have just been crowned NWCL Premier League champions with 102 points, eleven more than second placed Ramsbottom. They come with a fine reputation for fast paced all action football. Runcorn Town have made major efforts to progress onwards and upwards as a club and have just been rewarded by finishing runners up in the league below New Mills in the NWCL Division 1. This NWCL Challenge Cup Semi Final should be capable of producing plenty of thrills and spills... and importantly goals.
Match Programme:
One of the better ones I've purchased this season, some good news and views from the club and plenty of information about the visitors, all in all a good effort and well worth the money. A nice change from the ones that take 2 minutes to read through cover to cover.
The Tea Hut:
Not impressed I'm afraid. Looked a bit grubby with a table below the hatch offering dirty plastic knives and forks with no spoons for hot drinks. Also the sauce bottles were in dire need of a wipe, they had some badly congealed tops, Frugal Glenn got a hot dog but upon looking at the sauce bottle lids, he did without his standard choice of tomato ketchup and mustard, not a happy bunny. It appears that the pies quickly sold out so I just had a cup of tea, good job I stopped them lobbing the tea bag in the bin after 10 seconds in the hot water, I asked them to kindly leave it in the cup. I think the operation needs a bit more hands on practical management from more experienced personnel, no disrespect intended to the kids running the show over the counter.
The Action:
This match didn't fail to produce some quality football from two fine sides. It was full of twists and turns and end to end drama.New Mills played down the slope in the first half and quickly built up a clinically executed 3 goal lead courtesy of Daniel Douglas-Pringle (10), Nick Swirad (17) and Dean Crowe (31), the pace and cutting edge as they relentlessly broke forward from midfield was awesome.Many sides would throw in the towel and just try and keep the score down, to their credit Runcorn Town decided to have a go back. Slowly but surely they started to turn the New Mills defence and time and time again they got themselves into goal scoring positions, as the second half continued they got a goal back from Jason Carey (54) but to be bluntly honest they missed a whole host of opportunities.New Mills continued to attack down the other end and it is a wonder the scoreline wasn't 12-8. Runcorn Town wouldn't give up and battled on as the final whistle approached, remarkably the pacy Enine Adegbenro snatched a second goal just into injury time. The referee played out another 4 minutes as New Mills just about held on despite yet another chance which the visitors missed. It finished 3-2 to New Mills but what a great performance from both of these sides, a truly great semi-final.
Characters:
I had expected coach party proportions of groundhoppers at this end of season event, in reality there didn't seem to be many around. I did manage to spot a couple of notebook scribblers deep into the second half though. Good to see a fair few Runcorn Town supporters making the trip, they really got behind their team as they fought back during the second half. Looks like New Mills will now take on Winsford United in the final, I'm informed its being played at Curzon Ashtons ground over in Tameside.

Vodkat Challenge Cup Semi Final Classic

2011-05-07T20:04:00.004+01:00

New Mills 3 'Plucky' Runcorn Town 2

Cup tie drama in the Peak District as the Premier League runaway champions slogged it out with the runners up from Division 1. It all added up to some fine quality football. The fans got value for money but... oh what might have been? Sloppy report, cheesy hype and tacky photo's up Sunday evening.

tin

2011-04-01T06:13:00.006+01:00

I have agreed to provide some art that relates to football, especially non league. My opening piece is something i did last year. The title is 'tin'. Hmmm.

More Trafford pictures

2011-03-28T10:36:00.021+01:00

Saturday 26th March

Evo Stik Northern Premier League Division 1 North

Trafford 1 AFC Fylde 4

Here are some more pictures from my visit to Trafford

Trafford

2011-03-27T16:15:00.047+01:00

Saturday 26th March,

Evo Stik Northern Premier League Division 1 North,
Trafford 1 AFC Fylde 4,
Attendance: 147,
Admission: £7,
Programme: £1.50,
Tea hut purchases: Cheeseburger £2.50, Tea 80p,
Weather: Cloudy,
Parking: Car park outside the entrance, easy getaway I picked Frugal Glenn up from outside Booze Busters and swung the Match Shed around for the M62 come M60 around Manchester. It wasn't even dinner time. Due to the 'Overpaid-Spoilt-Jessies-Eleven' playing Wales this afternoon live on Sky a lot of non league sides chose to kick off at 1pm, Trafford was one of them. Cannot blame them really, its probable that more punters would turn up for an early kick off rather than not at all with the 3pm game on the telly (even it is the overpriced characterless Sky version that most people watch in the pub). Can you believe we didn't even get delayed highlights on terrestrial tv for this international qualifying status match, I'd only have a good moan anyway but thats not the point, pay for view television has already taken rugby league and cricket away from the normal man in the street and nowadays we're left to pay our extortionate BBC licence for a bit of poxy cycling, boring womens swimming and a few sports cars following each other around millionaires race tracks! Give me the Northern Premier League live action any day. As we approached Junction 10 of the M60 I half expected a traffic jam, besides this being the turn off for Trafford FC its also the connection for the unholy designer shopping hell of The Trafford Centre (cue shiver from Frugal Glenn), I kept a firm grip of the Match Shed steering wheel, dozens of daft women in big 4 x 4's were swopping lanes at random and generally failing to drive in a straight line, the Match Shed didn't like it one bit. Miraculously I got the car down the slip road without any of the women hitting us. No sooner had I got within a couple of miles of the ground when I discovered the local council had closed the road. Some jobsworths on triple time were digging a hole on the very road junction highlighted on my scribbled directions for the ground (unbelievable, I know). I thought councils didn't have any money any more? The only reason the road was closed wasn't because of the hole, that was on the pavement, it was for parking the bloody vehicle that they came in! Frugal Glenn admirably took on the responsibility of emergency navigator and promptly directed me into a multi storey car park (with no 'U' turns) in Urmston town centre. He was immediately sacked.Half an hour later we picked up some diversion signs and luckily fell upon the Shawe View Stadium, the nicely kept home of Trafford Football Club. You take a sharp corner by the Bird in Hand pub and the narrow lane takes you down to a spacious and well maintained large car park directly adjacent to the turnstile entrance. A gang of well dressed Fylde committee looking men entered the ground at the same time as me and Frugal, they made a direct dash for the Tea Hut (they looked pretty hungry) only to be extremely disappointed that the shutters were still down and it wasn't yet open for business despite it only being 30 minutes to kick off. To make the situation worse you could hear the burgers sizzling as they pre-prepared them on the griddle inside the hut, that gorgeous smoky smell of flash frying beef wafted out towards the slavering Fylde committee men who stomped around for a short while before following me and Frugal Glenn into the tiny bar in a nearby portakabin. I ordered a pint of Stella at £2.90, I needed a drink after all that stress in the Match Shed. We watched the end of Englands innings in the Cricket World Cup clash against Sri Lanka on the big screen, it was obvious we hadn't got enough runs.Ten minutes before kick off we were back pitch side and in a rather large queue for the 'now-opened' Tea Hut. Unfortunately the Fylde committee mob were ahead of us in the queue and appeared to be buying in bulk. Two nice ladies seemed to be doing a good job of getting everyone served and we were soon at the counter. I was taken aback at Frugal Glenn placing his biggest ever order at a football ground Tea Hut, it turned out his wife had put him on a diet and he'd been struggling for over two weeks now. He promptly ordered Chicken Curry Pie, Peas and Gravy with a Bovril on the side. I noted that the hut was dishing out Peters Pies which I've not been too keen on in the past so I went for a large looking cheeseburger which came on a nice fresh roll. It was most enjoyable which is nice to note after quite a few bad experiences at other grounds in the recent past. Frugal Glenn liked his purchase as well, apparently the Peters Pie was spot on? Looking around the Shawe View ground it comes across as an appealing environment to watch football, its well kept and has a spacious feel to it whilst still offering good views of the action.It has stands on 3 sides all of an identical structure, the two down each touchline offer seating and the one behind the nets offers a covered terrace, just beside the covered end a young lad with a rucksack pulled out a large Trafford FC flag and hung it on the nearby fence, there wasn't a massive crowd today and it was good to see a bit of enthusiasm for the local team, especially from the younger elements, lets remember Old Trafford is only a short distance from here. The match programme gives a good run down of the squads and recent performances, all in all a decent publication. Trafford are 16th in the NPL Division 1 North and have had a couple of welcome away wins recently against well respected opposition, namely Chorley and Clitheroe. AFC Fylde have strengthened their profile this term and currently reside in 4th spot in the table, they beat Lancaster City 4-1 earlier in the week, todays game had the makings of an interesting encounter. I dont think it was the Barcelona type kit that Fylde played in but they certainly put on a master class of entertaining passing football in the first 45 minutes. The first goal went in with only half a minute on the clock and by half time they were 3-0 up. To their credit the young Trafford side tried to match them and played some very neat football themselves, they never gave up but they couldn't create the clear opportunities to get back in the game.Shawe View offers a nice level looking playing surface but there did appear to be a few bobbly patches on closer scrutiny, not a critisism as there was a hell of a lot of good passing football on offer in this game, usually its hard to truly judge a pitch as the ball is usually being hoofed twenty yards up in the air. I'd say the pitch at Trafford compliments the high standard of the rest of the ground. AFC Fylde certainly appear a very good side, whether they can take the momentum to some end of season reward remains to be seen, they seemed to ease back a bit in the second half and let Trafford come onto them a little more but the game was never in doubt, they went 4-0 up when Michael Barnes finshed off a sublime move in the 58th minute, Trafford bagged a consolation goal when Kyle Harrops cross come shot sneaked over the keeper with a minute left to play. All in all a very convincing high quality performance from AFC Fylde, I'm impressed! They look strong in every department.Having said that I do feel there is some hope for this young Trafford side, they play the game the right way and with a bit more punch up front they could well develop into something like the finished article, Centre Forward Tom Bentham could do with a bit more support when they go forward, perhaps too often he was left on his own against some very competent Fylde defenders. I do hope they keep trying to play the right way though, such a welcome change after weeks of watching hoof-ball across the Northern Leagues. It was back to the Match Shed for me and Frugal Glenn come full time, neither of us fancied cramming into the portakabin bar to watch The Playboys on Sky, no disrespect to the portakabin bar either (my glass of Stella earlier in the day was first class), it looked a great place for a quite pint under more normal circumstances, besides Frugal Glenn had a date with a plate of grated carrot and iceberg lettuce.

Forget the shops, this is the real Trafford Centre!

2011-03-26T19:26:00.003Z

Saturday Dinner Time

Evo Stik-Up NPL Division 1 North

TRAFFORD 1 AFC FYLDE (aka Barcelona) 4

Me and Frugal Glenn hit Manchester for plenty of passing football and some decent grub from the Tea Hut.

Hope to have some visit report scribblings and a few pictures on here sometime Sunday evening.

Colne

2011-03-20T12:34:00.011Z

Saturday 19th March

North West Counties League Premier Division

Colne 3 Runcorn Linnets 2

Attendance: 122

Admission: £5

Programme: £1

Tea hut purchase: Value for money tea at 50p

Weather: Bright and sunny day, reasonably mild

Parking: On the field behind the kop end, easy exit

Having had some truly awful food at recently visited grounds I wasn't going to be taking any chances today. I stopped at an en-route chippy after setting off for Colne and had a splendid feast of a Hollands Steak & Kidney Pie, Chips and Gravy, it cost me £2.65p but certainly filled me up. I scoffed it in the Match Shed whilst listening to Spurs cocking it up against West Ham. Back on the road my journey took me past Todmorden open market with its little old ladies mingling amongst the old wooden stalls of cheap crimplene slacks and towers of cut price bog rolls, then down into Burnley and right alongside the famous Turf Moor ground, I see that the old pub next to the traffic lights just up from the away end is now a Turkish kebab house. Perhaps kebabs are cheaper than pints nowadays? Never been much of a kebab fan actually, though I do respect that they have quite a following with the late night crowd. Not long later the Match shed was entering Colne via the eastern conclusion of the M65, the massive Boundary Mill shopping centre gleaming in the bright sunshine, the car park beside the slip road was packed with cars and coaches. Colne FC is not far from here, you take a left at the first roundabout and climb up the long hill along Harrison Drive, its peppered with speed bumps and lots of resident-parked vehicles, at the very top the road turns into a badly rutted track which runs past the local Rugby Union club, the proud little football ground stands in acres of open space just a bit further on, matchday parking is in a field behind the covered end of the stadium. As I entered the ground it appeared most people had packed into an old lorry container which had been converted to what was trendily identified as 'The Reds Bar'. I detected a few Runcorn accents rising above the broad Lancastrian tones of the locals. The hilltop location of the ground really hits home when you notice the wide open vista beyond the open end of the ground, the spread of stone houses built on the steep sides of the far valley rises majestically until the sweeping fells become superb open moorland, mile and mile of greenery as it stretches east to Yorkshire (probably heading for Skipton and Silsden way). There is a really significant slope to the pitch at Colne and it dips even further once you get down towards the far right hand corner, it looks like the edge of the world down at the corner flag, have to say it did look a decent playing surface though (despite the runaway brow of the hill). It was time for a cup of tea at 'The Reds' tea hut, a great looking traditionally structured emporium knocking out the finest tea bags in East Lancashire for 50p a hit, I was dry after my Pie and Chips dinner. Looking at the pies on offer in the hut I was glad I'd gone to the chippy, they looked overheated, very brown and a bit burnt on the crust, I later witnessed a disgruntled old timer struggling to get his dentures to make in-roads on a meat and potato, he gave up after a while and a third of it went in the bin.Walking around the place just before kick off you realise the ground provides a really nice setting for non league football, it has the right feel to it if you know what I mean, the covered terrace behind the nets, the charismatic little main stand by the halfway line and a selection of odds and sods type structures here and there give it some atmosphere sadly a tad lacking at the more modern grounds. The teams came out to the speakers blasting out 'The Final Countdown' (what a shyte track to play) and we were soon into the business of the day. Colne were 5th and looking handy for a big push in the run in, the Linnets were lower midtable in 16th and probably hoped for a respectable final league placing, got to say they brought quite a few fans over from the River Mersey for this one, admirable support indeed, most of them spilled out of 'The Reds Bar' with broad smiles and red faces from their hastily gulped pints. Colne kicked up the hill in the first half but struggled to make an impact, Runcorn kicked down the hill and couldn't keep up with the ball, nine times out of ten it always ended up down at the corner flag on the edge of the world, I'm sure the winger disappeared over the precipice for ten minutes before the mountain rescue team and some ball boys got him back on again.I gave it 15 minutes before realising this was a terribly scrappy encounter with little cohesive play worthy of praise, far too many passes went astray and it seemed Colne had now adopted a very direct 'long-ball' style of play which wasn't pretty to look at. Runcorn countered this by hoofing the ball right back down the pitch at every opportunity, it was all 'thwack-bung-wallop', midfield craft had gone back in the wrapper. Not good. I stood near the dug outs in the first half and soon realised why there was quite a bit of room in what is usually a decent vantage point. The Colne Assistant Manager, Lol McMahon, provided a non-stop (and I mean NON-STOP) running commentary of touchline instructions which were yelled out to the poor Colne players at a truly deafening level, I wouldn't mind but most of what was being passed on was inane gibberish and this bloke never stopped for a breath, on and on and on he went, nearly everybody not already in the know soon moved on for a bit of peace and quite, I've seen a few yellers in my time but Lol is in a premier league all of his own.Perhaps a 1-1 half time scoreline was fair enough, it had been awful, the only piece of skill was the opening goal from Colne's James Crokern, a sublime 30 yard strike straight into the top corner, brilliant. Half time real-life drama Colne style hit the stadium during the break, the committee couldn't find the winning holder of raffle ticket number 68! They wouldn't rest until they'd hunted down the winner, they must have been desperate to get shut of that 5 quid meat pack with todays sell by date on it. Two of the committee went around the entire ground and asked every person if they had ticket 68, obviously the undercover winner had better stuff to store in their fridge than some dodgy Colne burgers and a few link sausages.The action on the pitch failed to improve in the second half, the game got a bit niggly and the Referee didn't seem to be making it any better, he got some major grief from the Linnets fans, some of his decisions did seem rather vague. Despite the visitors snatching a 2-1 lead which Colne levelled and then went ahead by 3-2 the quality of football was dire. The only magical moment was the appearance of a flock of sheep in the field behind the dug outs, perhaps Lols dulcet tones emitting from the Colne bench were somewhat similar to the Fellside Farmer announcing another bag of hay? Even the sheep cleared off after 5 minutes though, Lol was on fire. Runcorn rallied for a chance of a late equaliser and a welcome degree of late tension gripped the ground, a few quick attacks gave the Linnets fans hope, it quickly fizzled out when the Ref they admired so much sent a Runcorn player off for no apparent reason just before the death. Not a good match but I have to say.... I did like the ground. Wonder if they ever got the raffle winner?

The Big Match in the Lancashire Hills

2011-03-19T20:36:00.003Z

Ok, there were some other decent fixtures knocking about this Saturday but I reckoned the plum game in North West non league circles (match of the day wise) centered on the East Lancashire town of Colne. The multi coloured yellow and green Runcorn Linnets provided the opposition (including noisy supporters.... dont think they liked the Ref too much?)

Up on the hill above the exit slip road for the M65 a hidden gem of a traditional and charismatic football ground resides at the slightly dubiously titled XLCR Stadium, its right at the very top of Harrison Drive just beyond the Rugby Union club.

This was hilltop football with all the mad trimmings of the sloping pitch syndrome.

Feel free to visit the Tea Hut around Sunday evening to see my visit report (and dodgy pictures) for some sublime North West Counties League hoofing and crazy charging around.

I'll be giving my humble 'uneducated' ramblings of a nice ground hosting a crap football match between a couple of sides a few chapters short of the entertainment-book, despite 5 goals. However, credit where its due, it was a very, very good location to watch a football match!

Diesel at the pump

2011-03-16T18:34:00.002Z

As local Diesel prices soared even higher today, (the garage down the road is now robbing people for 144.9 per litre), I regretfully decided to cancel my planned midweek match tonight.

I couldn't afford to drive to and from Harrogate Railway Athletic, it is simply costing too much money to put the Match Shed on the road for a 120 mile plus trip.

The ridiculous greed of cash hungry capitalists is beyond belief, the slightest oil related blip anywhere in the world immediately results in any type of garage slamming 5p a litre on the pump price (it hardly ever comes down again).

Sorry, can't pay it, wont pay it and lets not forget all the tax that the Government takes from this, I know times are hard but the situation is already on a 'Daylight Robbery' scale.

Like a lot of people who travel around to partake in a hobby, I am judging whether it is still affordable?

It is hard enough to afford fuel for essential travel as part of 'needs-must' everyday life.

More snaps from wonderful Worsbrough

2011-03-15T10:07:00.010Z

YORKSHIRE! YORKSHIRE! YORKSHIRE!

Sorry about that, got a bit carried away again.

I'm still buzzing from the white hot atmosphere at the AFC Emley clash.

Here are some more snaps from Worsbrough Bridge Athletic last Saturday.

Worsbrough Bridge Athletic

2011-03-13T11:34:00.011Z

Saturday 12th March

Northern Counties East League Division 1

Worsbrough Bridge Athletic 1 AFC Emley 2

Attendance: 95

Admission: £4

Programme: £1

Tea hut purchases: Tea 50p, Chips and brown liquid £1.50

Weather: Dull and grey, bit of rain in the second half

Parking: Not easy, slung it on the pavement by the ground

After a few weeks off the road the Match Shed was back on football business, a mixture of bad weather, multi-postponements and a mind sapping job had taken its toll. As the Shed sped ever eastwards it felt good to be going to a game again. Even todays planned procedures had to be amended at the 12th hour, I was booked in to visit AFC Darwen for their tasty clash against NWCL Division 1 leaders Runcorn Town, typically, it was postponed due to a waterlogged pitch. I was about to set off over Blackburn way when I spotted the cancellation whilst glancing at the Runcorn Town website, well done to them for communicating it, neither Darwen or the official Vodkat NWCL websites had even bothered! So here I was en-route for Worsbrough Bridge Athletic just a few miles south of Barnsley. The route took me through the South Pennines and Calderdale before cutting across via Huddersfield to meet up with the M1 South beyond Flockton. I was only on the M1 for one junction before pulling off for downtown Barnsley. The Worsbrough Park Road ground is on the A61 heading towards Sheffield (if you are approaching from the North West that is). The main road drops down to a river and a bridge just beside 'The Yorkshire Gas Shop', across the road is the nicely presented ground. The Fire Brigade were in action by the side of the road, somebody had set fire to some grass (not the pitch)? Trying to park at this place is mission impossible, there is a nice big open car park behind the riverside terrace (and the river) but its obviously placed there to capture walkers and nature lovers off on woodland rambles, hence the very steep 3 quid fee to dump your car. The Match Shed doesn't do pay charge car parks unless its absolutely necessary, ten minutes later the Match Shed was slung on some pavement between a lampost and a fence, I was directly outside the gate but it was a difficult tight squeeze and anyone arriving after me would have had little option of free space for parking (it was 2.20pm). When I left the ground after the game there had been a mass outbreak of ridiculously discarded vehicles taking up every square inch of kerbside, village green and residents-only access drives, it would have been a traffic wardens dreamworld, I felt pity for the dozens of blocked in vehicles well deep in the grid-lock. Take note to arrive early if you are thinking of visiting here, and make sure you have a clear exit route when you park. I was hungry and in need of refreshment.I had a wonder around for a short while and realised its a bit of a weird set up at Worsbrough, I could smell that greasy whiff of a deep fat fryer preparing hot chips but I couldn't find a tea hut? It had to be in the clubhouse overlooking the pitch, however, if you go through the turnstile you cannot get access to the clubhouse from inside the ground, this means you have to go back out through the turnstile and enter the club from the entrance beside the main road. Once inside I asked the ladies behind the snack bar type counter for a list of pies on offer, despite it now being just 15 minutes before kick off one of the ladies told me the pies had only just gone in the oven but they would be hot later on? She said they had some pork pies knocking about somewhere and they might be able to get one of those warmer a bit quicker but I was getting a slightly concerning vibe that this may not be the usual tea hut type experience, I said I'd pop back for something later, perhaps at half time? I ended up with a cup of tea which came in a proper nice pot and it was only 50p. I had a read of the programme which was decent enough for a pound and I particularly liked the simple but classic cover adorned with the red and blue club badge on a crisp white background. There seemed to be a good travelling support that had made the short journey from Emley, like Worsbrough they were more or less midtable and both sides needed a win today to have any chance of ending up with a respectable end to the season. Emley supporters always seem to wear the claret and blue club merchandise which is a credit to their following. The Park Road ground offers some good elevated hard standing around the clubhouse end and this extends to a charismatic little stand which provides seating across the halfway line. Moving further down the touchline we come across the tiny cricket pavillion and a scoreboard hut, both employed by the cricket team which uses the field in the summer, the pavillion doubles up as the referees and linesmans changing room. The far end only has some metal fencing behind it which is intended to protect the cricket square. Along the other touchline resides the covered riverside terrace which was built in 2008, this offers a decent enough view for those wanting a bit of space. The teams took the field and it looked a bit like one of those Anglo Scottish Cup Ties from the seventies, this one could have been Sheffield United v Hibernian, Worsbrough had the red and white stripes, AFC Emley had the green. The game took place on a bobbly sloping pitch and it was immediately apparent that 'The Hoof' was the chosen dish from todays specials board. Control was haphazard as ping-pong punting rained from left to right and back again.Shouts of encouragement, derision and anger echoed across the valley as players and coaches yelled incoherent statements littered with four letter swear words, a nice lady in a Marks and Spencers anorak was getting behind her Worsbrough heroes in the only way she knew how, she called the Emley right back a little weasel and a retard (oh dear). People should think about what they shout out before they say it I think, the fullback Max Joice took it in his stride and seemed to laugh it off, he told her she'd be better off at home where she belonged! Within 25 minutes AFC Emley had taken a 2 goal lead with very well taken goals from Dean Wharam and Mark Stuart. Dean went on to get in some very good positions throughout the game but unfortunately his finishing let him down, he could literally have had a sack full. Worsbrough just about held on in the remainder of the first half and they would have that slope in their favour in the second period. At half time I returned to the tea hut come snack bar, the pork pies looked tiny and the normal pies looked like those cheapo jobs from Iceland, I played it safe and asked the lady for just chips and gravy, a big mistake in hindsight, the chips were a stringy tasteless mush and the gravy was more like a chemical spill from a reprocessing plant than the anticipated delights of proper bisto, talk about a brown watery waste, it was truly awful.As predicted, once the second half got underway Worsbrough took the initiative and used the slope to their advantage, more and more pressure was built up and Rob Ward got one back with 16 minutes left. The pity was that Worsbrough couldn't create genuine opportunities and despite a disallowed Worsbrough goal Emley held on for a valuable away win. Perhaps if the visitors had taken their chances they'd fluffed earlier on, this game would have been well out of sight well before the final whistle. Not the best quality game I've seen this season but an interesting venue for a well contested fixture. I made my way out towards the turnstile gate passing the tea hut lady grabbing a crafty fag as she sat on the wall. Looked like she'd had a tough time with the half time rush for those slightly delayed pies. I suppose there is something to say for those punters who bring their own butties after all, it must surely beat what I had?

WBA in the NCEL

2011-03-12T21:32:00.003Z

Following the postponement of AFC Darwens game against league leaders Runcorn Town in the NWCL (my scheduled match) I initiated emergency Plan B action.

What transpired was a trip over Barnsley way to the delights of Worsbrough Bridge Athletic.

Yorkshires WBA were taking on the gritty AFC Emley in Division 1 of the Northern Counties East League.

There will be a Tea Hut style visit report posted on here around Sunday evening.

Tea Hut back on the road!

2011-03-11T19:45:00.006Z

A mixture of 'pants' type weather and a mentally deranging job have got in the way of Tea Hut action these last few weeks.

Something had to give! Dramatic and drastic action has opened up the door for the possibility of top drawer North West Counties League Division 1 action this coming Saturday.

Heading past Premier League stadia at Ewood Park continuing on just beyond the outer edge of Blackburn, AFC Darwen (12th) will be taking on league leaders Runcorn Town in one of the non-league 'match of the day' classics that the month of March is so culturally famous for. I'm hoping it will be living up to the extensive local media hype poured onto the fixture?

The question is should I take my (still new) 3 quid flask or rely on the local tea bags in the club tea hut?

Lets hope I get there, all being well, my visit report should be posted on the Tea Hut site sometime Sunday evening.

UPDATE: Saturday Lunchtime

Just found out that AFC Darwen v Runcorn Town has been POSTPONED due to a waterlogged pitch. Gobsmacked! Didn't realise it had even rained? Nothing on the Darwen website, nothing on the Vodkat NWCL website, I luckily spotted the call-off whilst casually glancing at the Runcorn Town site. What a joke! Darwen must have its own micro-climate? Very poor communication though.

Bogland!

2011-02-26T12:46:00.003Z

Is this the worst season for continual postponements ever?

For the second Saturday running the North of England has seen a flood (excuse the pun) of 'yet-more' waterlogged pitches.

There are some major call-offs throughout the North West Counties League and the Northern Counties East divisions today (Saturday 26th February).

All of my 3 potential fixtures have drowned without trace.

That smarmy cow in the floral frock never said anything about 8 inches on the weather last night.

Its getting beyond a joke.

Hyde FC

2011-02-13T14:05:00.012Z

Saturday 12th February

Blue Square Conference North

Hyde FC 1 Gloucester City 3

Attendance: 295

Admission: £10

Programme: £2

Tea hut purchase: Tea £1

Weather: Early drizzle, becoming dry and sunny

Parking: Club car park, easy getaway

Hyde is one of those M60/M67 satellite towns near Manchester, its in the bit past Ashton under Lyne as you head down towards Stockport. Its got a weather worn Morrisons Supermarket a Step 6 outside market and plenty of traditional North Western boozers. The Match Shed made easy progress through the town, hardly a soul to see, they were all on pints watching pub tv, it was a 12.45pm kick off for United v City. I reversed the Match Shed into a nice space in the club car park and switched the radio on for the last half hour of the local drama taking place on the other side of Manchester. The most overpaid, most out of form, most over-hyped forward in fancy-pants premiership football scored a wonder goal with the best overhead scissors kick ever, according to the cretin wetting himself on the radio that is. I'd judge it myself over a Chicken Kung Po watching Match of the Day. After the 2-1 win to United I made my way through the turnstiles, it had started to rain, it fitted the environment especially as Manchester City had just lost their last realistic opportunity to go for the title, all around me were the trademark City colours of light and dark blue, every wall, every stand, every roof, even the match programme... City were everywhere!They play their reserve games at Hydes ground and there has obviously been a done-deal on them putting money into the place to raise the standards of some of the facilities. Don't get me wrong the Ewen Fields stadium is a very good little ground and looks a picture but the relentless sprawl of City colours, City crests and Etihad advertising does rob the place of any discernible Hyde FC identity.Without going into a history lesson, Hyde FC used to be Hyde United before the City input and previous pictures of Ewen Fields verify it was a lot more red than blue. Enough of this, I understand clubs need to make ends meet in hard times and the City influence will have doubtless eased the financial pressures for the Hyde football club, so good luck to them, I'll stop being snobby about what paint is on the wall! However, it was quite ironic that they were playing some music from Oasis as I made my first reconnaissance of the Tea Hut set up, I half expected to see Liam Gallagher emptying another bag of frozen chips into the chip fryer.Hyde have not one but two decent looking tea huts and to be honest there were quite a few big looking blokes in the darkened corners of the stands greedily scoffing the stock. The first tea hut you come across is just inside the turnstiles at the rear of the main stand. This seemed to be doing a steady trade and burgers were high up the list of advertised delicacies.For those of you who may have read my visit report from Goole last week you will understand why burgers are currently off my menu, despite trauma therapy with Doctor Sing it will probably be another month before I can face a tea hut style cheeseburger again. The second Hyde tea hut is beside the pitch down near one of the corner flags, a friendly lady was knocking out all kinds of stuff for the visiting Gloucester City supporters, as I'd had steak pie, curry and chips for my dinner before setting off I decided to pace myself and just have a tea, a bit steep at a quid a plastic cup but it was reasonable in size and I left the bag in.Todays Conference North encounter was one of those six pointers which will become more prominent from this month onwards. Both Hyde and Gloucester are not that far from the trap door positions and this was a game neither side could afford to lose. Hyde have had a few decent results against Nuneaton and Redditch recently but Gloucester still have quite a few games in hand, a win today would doubtless build momentum. Things got going with a fast paced approach, both midfields eagerly sprayed the ball about and the first quarter produced some quality moves and nice one-two's going forward. We'd already had a couple of quick goals, the first one from Gloucesters impressive Darren Edwards after 6 minutes followed by an immediate Hyde reply from Kevin Holsgrove. I'd say Holsgrove was the stand out player in that first half.When you add on each side missing a penalty there was certainly enough drama to keep the supporters interested. Half time arrived with the scores level at 1-1. The second half witnessed a shift in impetus, Gloucester increased their momentum and started to dominate the midfield, Hyde resorted to hoofing it long rather than sticking with the more controlled approach play they had displayed earlier in the game, gone were the intricate passing pieces from Holsgrove and Lee Rick, it was foolishly replaced by the panic induced 'punt from the back'. Perhaps the turning point was a superbly struck long range net-buster from the home side, unfortunately for Hyde the referee had blown for a Gloucester foul a split second before the goal, it was a crushing blow and definitely had a bearing on the proceedings. Gloucester put their good luck to good means, Darren Edwards ended up with a hat trick, his last goal, in injury time was a superb piece of individual wizardry which saw him bamboozle two retreating defenders out on the touchline before he clinically cut inside and put the ball past the Hyde FC keeper. The small band of loyal Gloucester supporters went mad with delight.It finished up a 3-1 convincing win for the visitors and they were well worth the 3 points. If they can continue to play decent football from midfield and the likes of Darren Edwards and Mike Symons can keep dominating defences, those games in hand might just see them move into the more comfortable half of the table. As for Hyde, they now face two tough away games at Worcester and Eastwood Town, sides already battling hard for points themselves, one has to compliment Hyde for some of the fine football they played in the first half but the panic, kick and hope stuff we all saw in that last 45 wont win many games. Lets hope Neil Tolson can address the issue and get them playing the right way, they have the quality, they just need the game plan. Come full time it was a nice sharp exit for the Match Shed, the problem with Hyde is that if you dont know the place its such a bloody pain to find the M67 westbound again, anyway, eventually I stumbled across it. Needless to say all the pubs looked packed with half cut lads in replica-colours spilling on the pavements outside the doors, the United v City dinner-time session obviously had a few more hours to go yet? It should be rocking in the kebab houses come 11.30.

A trip to Ewen Fields

2011-02-12T20:06:00.004Z

Saturday 12th February

I reckon its time for a bit more Conference North stuff. Today I had the pleasure of visiting the splendid Ewen Fields ground, home of Hyde FC.

My visit report, which includes reference to a jolly good away win for Gloucester City, will hopefully be posted on the Tea Hut by Sunday evening.

Nice ground.

Goole AFC

2011-02-06T11:37:00.011Z

Saturday 5th February

Evo-Stik Northern Premier League Division 1 South

Goole AFC 2 Sheffield FC 5

Attendance: 189

Admission: £7

Programme: £1.50

Tea Hut stuff: Cheeseburger £2, tea 70p, crisps 60p

Weather: Really dull, relentless rain, horrible

Parking: Down Carter Street leading to the ground

I spent the latter part of Saturday morning looking at the various non league websites providing information for games planned to take place in the North of England. A tidal wave of confirmed postponements rippled outwards throughout the North West Counties League, the Northern Counties East League and most of the Evo Stik Northern Premier League. For the fourth Saturday running an awful lot of cash starved clubs had no choice but to put the 'match-off' boards on the gate again, this time it wasn't -5 icy temperatures, it was relentless rain and lots of it, it had doshed it down at Krugg Hall since Thursday afternoon 'non-stop'. One of my 4 chosen targets seemed to be hanging on whilst all the other venues fell around it, a phone call to Goole AFC at 11.45am confirmed that despite some steady light rain their home game against Sheffield would almost certainly go ahead.30 minutes later I was in the Match Shed en-route to picking up Frugal Glenn. The M62 Eastbound was straight forward enough despite the never ending downpour, come 2.15pm we parked up on Carter Street just up from the turnstiles. Frugal Glenn pointed out a fish and chip shop which looked ok, I didn't take him up on it mentioning I wanted to sample something from the Tea Hut inside the ground, unfortunately this turned out to be a massive mistake! I hit the Tea Hut as soon as I got through the turnstile, it looked decent enough with all the usual signs of a typically proficient properly functioning catering outlet. Now let me make it clear, I am not going to slaughter Goole AFC on here for what happened next, the youngsters in the Tea Hut serving the grub were perfectly friendly and I understand the club needs to make a profit from the food to service the reality of running a football team in very hard times, however, the cheeseburger I purchased for £2 was one of the worst 3 burgers I have ever had (ever). It was button burger in size on one of those multi-pack cheap bread buns which immediately deflated my enthusiasm because it just looked very tiny, the much bigger problem once I took a bite was the fact it was cold! Oh dear. I'd noticed that the lad in the Tea Hut didn't use a hot plate, he didn't even use a microwave, he seemed to get the burger from somewhere low down out of view and I remember being surprised how quickly it appeared on the counter. Frugal Glenn advised me to take it back, although I'd only taken one bite I decided to just cut my losses and bin it, besides there were quite a few punters lined up at the Tea Hut by now and I didn't fancy standing in the rain again. Instead I concentrated on a big plastic mug of tea I'd purchased from them (which did look quite impressive for 70p).Oh dear, problem No.2, the plastic mug gave out such a plastic-like after taste it completely drowned out any taste of proper tea, this was not a good Tea Hut experience I'm afraid, without wishing to appear over critical to the club, because I do very much realise what a great job they are doing in ensuring football for the town, they might want to have a look at reviewing a few procedures on the Tea Hut side of things. I later went back for a bag of crisps to show there were no hard feelings (or was it more to do with the fact I was starving)? Just before the game started I was very pleased to finally meet up with Reynard The Fox who runs the excellent Reynards Hunting Grounds website, it was a little disturbing to find out he held a secret flame for Arsenal (alongside his Leicester City favourites) but apart from such poor taste he is a really nice chap (I'm more of an Ex Spurs man myself). I dont think anybody new to Goole was seeing the town in the best light today, a big grey sky provided a damp dull setting for non stop rain of differing strengths, the banker of the day was the inevitable fact you was going to get wet.It proved very difficult to get any type of photographs without the camera getting soaked. A pity because there are some splendid backdrops to the football ground. Have to say like a lot of folk I'm not particularly keen on running tracks around football pitches and I reckon this fact had a great deal to do with my inability to get into this match as closely as I usually do, the action seemed a bit removed and stuggled to hold my attention, I suppose the first half was a bit scrappy and it seemed to just pass me by. From what I did take in Sheffield seemed the more consistent side and did put one or two decent moves together, Goole appeared to have a problem in getting delivery from midfield and applying pressure upfront. I was getting the impression this could be a 0-0 and when you see the final score it just goes to show how wrong I was! Smash, bang, wallup we got 3 quick goals in the last few minutes of the first half and Goole went in with a 2-1 lead and Sheffield had also lost their keeper to injury. I spent the second half on the far covered terrace opposite the main stand with Frugal and Reynard, we all thought Goole would pepper the Sheffield goal as they had lost their keeper, it never happened. Goole never got into the area's to let loose some shots, on the rare occasion they did, the replacement keeper made a superb full length stop that even Pat Jennings would have been proud of. Sheffield got right back into this game when the impressive Oliver Banks smashed in a 40 yarder from nowhere, a classic goal! The tide had turned, Sheffield grew in confidence and looked a bit sharper and resourceful with the ball, 3 more goals came before the close to provide the classy South Yorkshire side with an impressive 5-2 away win. Sheffield have been in the wrong half of the division so far this season but when one considers the vast number of games in hand they have it would be no surprise to see them quickly climb the table. Hmm... wonder what odds you can get on them for a late surge? Although this game provided 7 goals I have to say (in my view) it wasn't a classic, it was all a bit fragmented and scrappy despite Sheffield improving in that second period, the weather didn't help for sure. Things didn't improve on the journey home, the Match Shed suffered the anguish of the M62 being closed back over the Pennines, a major spanner in the works which witnessed an hour long detour over some very misty, damp and foggy moorland backroads. Apparently Frugal Glenns tea was thrown away!

Liversedge

2011-02-03T14:28:00.008Z

Tuesday 1st February

Northern Counties East League Premier Division

Liversedge 2 Armthorpe Welfare 2

Attendance: 60

Admission: £5

Programme: £1.50

Tea Hut purchases: None (had my tea at home)

Weather: Dry, calm evening, reasonably mild

Parking: Club car park, easy getaway

After the recent episodes of relentless torrential rain and ice station temperatures tonights weather offered a rare opportunity for a football match in the West Riding of Yorkshire. It was almost mild really, certainly a hell of a lot warmer than recent weeks up here. I had my ready meal of Marks and Spencers spaghetti bolognese and set out in a south easterly direction in the Match Shed, this evenings route-plan took me through Sowerby Bridge and Halifax before passing Baliff Bridge on the road heading out for Heckmondwike, proper West Yorkshire country which seemed to offer a charasmatic wide range of hardy local pubs and various welcoming eateries. Plenty of choice but not many punters on a dark Tuesday night, everywhere looked dead. The Clayborn Ground is down Quaker Lane, more of a tight little track than a lane really, its dark and riddled with some major potholes, the Match Shed was certainly not impressed, fortunately if you take the lane off Hightown Road its not too long and you are soon welcomed by the brightly lit ground and the adjoining car park. It was about 35 minutes before kick off and some of the players were still only arriving, obviously we would be encountering a slightly delayed kick off. A big tall guy dressed in Armthorpe kit popped out from the clubhouse to check his car was properly locked, I recognised him as that well known centre forward of numerous different league clubs Leo Fortune West, quite a capture for the Doncaster based side, especially when they had another household-name league player in tonights side, Ben Muirhead of ex Bradford City and Rochdale fame. I spent another 15 minutes sat in the parked up Match Shed, I'd invested in a small flask which cost me 3 quid in a sale, rather than fork out for hot drinks from the tea hut I was now 'how-you-say' economising by bringing my hot drink with me for a fraction of the cost, I'm pleased to say the new Match Flask performed admirably. It was glasses on and into the ground, I liked the Clayborn Ground straight away.The clubhouse and tea hut are set back on a rise overlooking the sweeping vista of the stadium from above the corner flag. To one side is a stone built covered terrace behind the nets, down the nearest touchline is the Stuart Silverwood stand a longish seated stand with 3 rows of seating, this side of the ground is slightly raised above pitch level so the views are excellent. The far end and opposite touchline are just hard standing but you get a nice outlook from this area as you can watch the action with the backdrop of the nice looking clubhouse sitting majestically in the distance. I bet this place is really good on a nice bright afternoon, the lights on the far horizon sweeping across miles and miles of open country must make for some very good views for sure. That tea hut I mentioned is called 'Half-Timers' and seemed to have a good reputation, sadly I was still full from my spaghetti bolognese which I'd backed up with a big wedge of ice cream for dessert. There were quite a few locals tucking into trays of hot food or slurping cups of tea, with cheeseburgers at £1.60 and pie & peas only a couple of pounds it seemed good value. My programme was £1.50 and it was a decent enough read, the cover emphasises a 100 years of Liversedge football with team picures of various squads going back over the years. The slightly delayed kick off only pegged out to 5 minutes so we were soon on our way and the game quickly swung into end to end action. Armthorpes very loud, very mouthy goalkeeper come captain, Jamie Green was soon into full flow, it proved to be a little bit too much flow in the 11th minute when he brought down Liversedge striker Ben Hardy right on the edge of the area. Jamie got himself a yellow card, Ben Hardy got up took the free kick and got himself a goal, 1-0 to Liversedge. Strangely the game fizzled out a bit after that, it got very scrappy for around 20 minutes with neither side looking decisive or confident, things picked up nearer half time but nobody expected what a rip-roaring second half lay ahead. The 'Half Timers' tea hut served out more grub for the locals at the break and we were soon back to the action and what action it was!Armthorpe absolutely battered Liversedge and created some glorious openings and clear cut scoring opportunities, however, try as they might, they couldn't get the ball in the net, defenders, the keeper, the woodwork, you name it, everything got in the way and somehow Liversedge held onto the lead. We were halfway through the second half before the dam burst, the pressure was just too much for plucky Liversedge, Adam Jones bagged Armthorpe a 68th minute scruffy looking but well deserved equaliser and most people thought the visitors would now go on to bag a good few more. Surely Liversedge would capitulate totally. What made this such a super match was the way Liversedge turned the tide and actually started to have a go back at Armthorpe, soon a good few chances were being created at the other end of the pitch as well. It was end to end attacking and a credit to the league, superb entertainment, this jumpers for goalposts playground special had more drama in store, both sides scored again and we finally ended up with an honourable 2-2 draw, to be honest it could have been 10 all, it was that good. Tensions inevitably came to the fore as the final whistle approached and a few hard challenges were going in, the small band of flat cappers supporting Liversedge were almost on the pitch such was the excitement, this has to be the best game I've seen so far this season, a a great night out at the Clayborn Ground for sure.

Night out at the Clayborn Ground

2011-02-02T19:23:00.005Z

Lucky enough to see my best match of the season (so far) last night. An end to end epic which reminded me of those 28-23 playground classics from long, long ago.

NCEL Premier

Liversedge 2 Armthorpe Welfare 2

Full visit report available on Thursday (3rd February).

Where's the Tea Hut

The Gross Incompetence of the NWCL

Bootleg Report: Ramsbottom 2 Salford City 1

Harrogate Railway Athletic 2 Salford City 0

All aboard for Harrogate Railway

Stalybridge Celtic 1 Hyde 3

Knutsford v Gamesley POSTPONED

Rochdale 0 Yeovil Town 0

Postponements: Seen it all now!

Sheffield United 3 Rochdale 0

More silly postponements in the North West

Colne v Maine Road postponement

Salford City 3 Skelmersdale United 3

Guiseley

Celtic switch off the Guiseley grinder

Bradford City

Am I on Candid Camera?

Car Park Charging?

Stalybridge Celtic

Celtic blitz Alty in the big derby

Liversedge

Back over Yorkshire way

Great football haircuts

Absolutely Pathetic! Thats it I'm afraid.

Oldham Boro

New Mills v Salford City

Non League Price Hikes

Skelmersdale United

The Skelmersdale New Town Experience

AFC Darwen

Cuts

Bamber Bridge

Ashton Athletic

Runcorn Town

Take The 4th Exit for Runcorn Docks

Irlam

Irlam lose the Cup!

FC Halifax Town

Shay Stadium

Altrincham

Craig Bellamy goes to Altrincham shocker!

Old Standians

Marsden

First game of the season today, MARSDEN

Some great looking friendlies on Saturday 9th July

Glastonbury

Retro old-school football programmes

Pre Season Friendly Options?

Mid Summer Bobbins

Its rained for 50 days and 50 nights

Prestatyn Town

Vodkat NWC League Cup Final

Hindsford

New Mills

Vodkat Challenge Cup Semi Final Classic

tin

More Trafford pictures

Trafford

Forget the shops, this is the real Trafford Centre!

Colne

The Big Match in the Lancashire Hills

Diesel at the pump

More snaps from wonderful Worsbrough

Worsbrough Bridge Athletic

WBA in the NCEL

Tea Hut back on the road!

Bogland!

Hyde FC

A trip to Ewen Fields

Goole AFC

Liversedge

Night out at the Clayborn Ground